Tweets Of The Week Aug 30-Sep 5 2020

This was the week of Antifa. Whether the super secret (but so obvious to those who will just look) anarchist army was throwing soup at cops ,packing commercial flights on their way to raze major cities, deploying submarines to sink pro-Trump boaters,  or—worst of all—donating to the Biden campaign, they kept busy these last  few days.

But, as you’re about to see, Antifa was not the only news happening this week. Luckily we have Twitter to keep us up on what’s really going on, the news behind the news, fake or otherwise. So come on in, pour a glass of your favorite beverage (or, if you’re Don Jr., lay out a big ol’ rail), and check out this week’s collection of some of the best of Twitter. Be sure to check out the poll, and especially be sure to use the comments section to add the best of what I missed on Twitter.

And a tip of the Antifa cap (“Make America Anarchist Again—MAAA”) to GDbot for their tweet suggestion this week.

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You got two options, Rudy.  Either stop tweetin’ when you’re drinkin’ or bring enough for the rest of us to get drunk so your tweets will make sense. https://t.co/h31Z60ylTR

— Tea Pain (@TeaPainUSA) August 31, 2020

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Vanilla ISIS pic.twitter.com/10jHL4ojA4

— Zack Bornstein (@ZackBornstein) August 30, 2020

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Or Eastern Europe.

I know, I know.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) August 31, 2020

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when you're a Trump kid and this months trust fund check still hasn't arrived https://t.co/7AQEdfExzK

— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) August 31, 2020

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Black bloc anarchists always travel by air to where they’re going to cause trouble because they want the frequent flyer miles. https://t.co/DCTFhiTIb3

— Josh Barro (@jbarro) September 1, 2020

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many people sickened on the plane, ate the fish, terrible food poisoning. guy comes up to me with tears in his eyes, he says, sir, sir, can you fly this plane, and land it? I said, surely you can’t be serious https://t.co/ddRVReyPPr

— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) September 1, 2020

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So these dudes, these dudes in black uniforms with equipment, just all together get on a commercial flight, in uniform, at the same time?

That is seriously shitty OpSec. I am worried that our shadowy organizations are not being trained properly.  THANKS MILLENNIALS

— SeriesOfMiniHats (@Popehat) September 1, 2020

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"We hope you enjoy your flight on Antifa Air. We know you have a lot of choices in Anarchist travel, and we thank you for choosing us over other carriers to sow mayhem in 'Democrat' cities." pic.twitter.com/vzhj3phZHi

— Oliver Willis (@owillis) September 1, 2020

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Halloween is coming up soon. I think I will dress up as a mailbox since nothing terrifies Republicans more.

— Jesse Lifson (@DoYouEvenLif) September 1, 2020

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"Mini Strokes" also happens to be Stormy's nickname for Trump.

— Alex Cole (@acnewsitics) September 1, 2020

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has anyone made a joke about antifa soupersoldiers yet

— Jacob Houston (@giantloserbaby) September 2, 2020

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I heard Antifa's true leader is ... Souperman.

— 🌿 𝐕𝖊𝖌𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖈 🌿 (@vegix) September 2, 2020

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We demand a return to traditional masculinity pic.twitter.com/d5o14YUJ3z

— Donald John President!!!! (@cactusflak) September 2, 2020

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Think, Mike, it would have been the last time you had an erection. https://t.co/l2ZJtIHpeo

— J. Elvis Weinstein (@JElvisWeinstein) September 2, 2020

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After learning that Joe Biden wants live fact-checking during the presidential debates, Donald Trump had to be told what facts are.

— Middle Age Riot (@middleageriot) September 3, 2020

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My favorite genre of Trump tweets is where he finds out what his administration is doing and says he's stopping it.https://t.co/4LvOBmAgtV

— Ben Friedman (@BH_Friedman) September 4, 2020

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If I were Ted Cruz, aside from killing myself, I would yell "TED SNOOZE!" every time I put five more minutes on the alarm clock.

— Dr. Monkey, ANTIFA (@VitruvianMonkey) September 4, 2020

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He could make infinite bread and he was still broke as fuck. He was objectively the worst capitalist in history https://t.co/XBNy4cncYs

— pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) September 4, 2020

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Incels are stocking up on tissues and moisturizer to be ready for this... https://t.co/oTC6tJiYQy

— The Rude Pundit (@rudepundit) September 4, 2020

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*Ron Howard voice* it did https://t.co/6OcaayseBz

— Jesse Plumpkins (@zachheltzel) September 5, 2020

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Dumbkirk https://t.co/LR6Nm657lB

— Devin Nunes' Alt-Mom (@NunesAlt) September 5, 2020

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Antifa submarines are the only way to explain this. Period. pic.twitter.com/RcTKwltUDA

— Thor Benson (@thor_benson) September 5, 2020

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How many cans of soup do you think it took to sink those boats in Texas???🤔🤔

— LOST in PA 😷 #PennsylvaniaForBiden (@WontSurvive4mor) September 6, 2020

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They raised a lot but spent it all on beautiful boats https://t.co/D7lM01WvPv

— Atrios (@Atrios) September 5, 2020

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Make America Seaworthy Again.

— David Corn (@DavidCornDC) September 5, 2020

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pic.twitter.com/RweC6hwdPD

— Brexit Air Cargo Ltd (@jemmy_wood) September 5, 2020

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Picking the Worst Senator is like picking the Stupidest Trump, you are absolutely sure of your choice, and then you remember that other one.

— Mrs. Betty Bowers (@BettyBowers) September 6, 2020

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The “I’ll-Suck-Your-Dick-For-More-Coke” look was a bold move. pic.twitter.com/zInfrZsqUP

— YS (@NYinLA2121) September 5, 2020

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This is a slap in the face to Spiro Agnew. And a shot in the face to Dick Cheney. https://t.co/KIBScjTBda

— Frank Conniff (@FrankConniff) September 5, 2020