In a Congress stuffed with morons, it is a heavy lift to be considered America’s dumbest politician — but Sen. Tommy Tuberville (R-AL) takes a solid run at it. In a conversation with Andrew Solander, a political reporter for Forbes magazine, he said he was opposed to the ‘1/6 commission’ — “until they make it bipartisan”.
He seems unaware that, in the agreement hashed out between the Chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee, Democrat Bennie Thompson, and Republican ranking member, John Katko, the cake was split into equal halves. Under the deal, the Commission would comprise 10 members, half chosen by Democrats (including the chair) and half chosen by Republicans (including the vice-chair); subpoenas could be issued upon approval of both the chair and vice-chair. It’s hard to say how the commission could be more fundamentally bipartisan.
Which raises the question, is Tuberville an idiot or a liar?
Of course, the answer is ‘both’. He’s a Republican, so lying is in his DNA. And he has already revealed himself to be intellectually shortchanged. Last November, in an interview with The Alabama Daily News, the newly elected Senator had trouble with constitutional fundamentals. Saying:
“Our government wasn’t set up for one group [political party] to have all three branches of government — wasn’t set up that way. You know, the House, the Senate, and the executive.”
People immediately pointed out that the three branches are the executive, legislative and judicial — something a high school student needs to know to pass a civics exam. But adding to his foolishness is his contention that political parties ever had any constitutional standing. America’s founding document makes no mention of ‘factions’ (as they were then known). Checks and balances were to be a product of different responsibilities assigned to the various branches, not of different political parties.
In the same interview, he went on to misidentify America’s enemy in WWII. After identifying Biden as a socialist — something the progressive wing of the Democratic party would laugh at — he said
“That’s concerning to me, that we’re to the point now where we’ve got almost half the country voting for something that this country wasn’t built on. I tell people, my dad fought 76 years ago in Europe to free Europe of socialism.”
The enemy, of course, was the fascist powers of Germany and Italy. While the only socialists in the conflict, the USSR, were our allies.
Does Tuberville’s background reveal something more about the man? Yes. He is a product of a backwoods upbringing in Arkansas. And as I say that, let me note that many great Americans came from the boondocks, most notably Abraham Lincoln. Rural Arkansas itself was the birthplace and childhood home of Bill Clinton — who is nobody’s fool, and certainly knows the three branches of government. However, statistically, Tommy would have been at an educational disadvantage.
He did attend college, Southern Arkansas University, on a football scholarship. Where for two years, he was also on the golf team. He graduated with a degree in Physical Education. And the reader can make of that what they will.
Tuberville then had a successful career as a college football coach. Although he gave an insight into his character at the end of the 1998 season. When asked if planned to leave his head coaching position at ‘Ole MIss’, he said, "They'll have to carry me out of here in a pine box". Two days later he left to take the same job at Auburn. Reinforcing his reputation for dishonesty.
So how did Tuberville win his Senate seat? First, he was up against a Democratic incumbent, Doug Jones, in one of America’s most cherry-red states. Jones had managed to win because his opponent was Roy Moore, who makes Tuberville look like a Nobel Laureate. Second, he refused to debate Jones. Or give interviews. Or even talk with reporters. His one policy plank was a promise to ‘stand with Trump’.
Give him credit. It worked. And now Alabama is in a good position to claim it is represented by America’s ‘dumbest in DC’. Although, GA’s ‘Space Laser’ Greene and CO’s ‘Gun Barbie’ Boebert are making strong cases among the freshmen class.
And the old guard, represented by such as TX’s, ‘Gormless’ Gohmert, WI’s ‘Blacks hate Kwanzaa’ Grothman, KY’s ‘Anti-vaxxer’ Paul, TX’s ‘Fetuses Masturbate’ Burgess, GA’s ‘Four Blood Moons’ Hice — and so many others — isn’t giving up its claim.
But luckily for these mouth-breathers, idiocy isn’t a political handicap as voters keep re-electing mental defectives. And as Napoleon pithily observed, “In politics, stupidity is not a handicap.”