Over the weekend, Rep. Madison Cawthorn made news once again for saying something relatively egregious about his fellow members of Congress. This time, instead of slandering Speaker Nancy Pelosi, or lying about himself and his own (lack of) achievements, Rep. Cawthorn made the claim, in a recorded interview, that people he had “looked up to” invited him to “sexual get together[s]” at their homes. Oh, without taking a breath, he also claimed some Congressperson did a “key bump of cocaine” in front of him.
It was a new level of what we political scientists like to call “a doozy” for Mr. Cawthorn. It is one thing for a Republican operative to blather mindless invectives in the general direction of the Democratic Party, but it is another thing to put your own party on blast for being what their Christian conservative-cum-QAnon-conspiracy-minded base might consider utter deviancy. Of course, the biggest problem the GOP faces is not the ongoing civil war between establishment neocon Republicans, like Mitch McConnell and Liz Cheney, and MAGA-style Republicans, like Cawthorn, Boerbert, Gosar, and Trump—it’s that the Republican Party is made up of something like 98% craven cowards.
This means a response, or what might be called a “backlash” to Cawthorn’s comments, has been entertaining—to say the least.
RELATED STORY: Madison Cawthorn turns his slander onto the Republican Party
Politico’s congressional reporter Olivia Beavers reports she has “multiple sources” telling her that behind closed doors, Leader Kevin McCarthy “says he plans to talk to freshman Rep. Madison Cawthorn over his orgy remarks.” This is me smiling.
Beavers followed this up with mention that OG Tea Party Rep. Steve Womack took time away from promoting the Joe Manchin theory that government programs only help deadbeat drug addicts (and maybe tens of millions of children) to complain that he is getting questions about these “orgies” Madison Cawthorn is talking about. This is me trying not to burst out laughing.
According to Politico, Womack went on to say “that many lawmakers go to bed at 9 PM and still use fax machines and flip phones, stating that it was inappropriate to paint them with a broad brush.” Time to grab the tissue paper because I’m laughing pretty hard. The beginning of Rep. Womack’s defense that many GOP Congress members couldn’t be involved in orgies and cocaine use is because they still use fax machines and flip phones? I mean, the 1970s were the heyday of orgies and cocaine use, and people were mostly using landlines and telephone booths.
On top of that, there are some Republicans who would like Cawthorn to name names, to prove “the truth of his comments,” while there are other Republicans who see this orgy-sized can of worms as a publicity nightmare if he actually does name names. I need more tissue paper.
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Rep. Cawthorn’s claims were made to John Lovell on a podcast called the Warrior Poet Society. Take that in. Wipe away those tears. Take a breath. Satire is dead, maybe? In the same interview, Cawthorn also fanned the QAnon flames by saying that the media and other politicians frequently use each other’s scandalous behaviors as leverage to get things they want—in essence, blackmailing one another for participating in things like the aforementioned orgies and cocaine use.
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Here’s a side note of sorts, Cawthorn said this, verbatim: “I do believe that the world is under the principality of the devil.” Okie dokie, dude. By the way, bearing false witness is double-recorded in the Old Testament, bro. Two books! Pssst, it’s the 9th Commandment. Get on it, warrior-poet guy!
I’m not saying Cawthorn is lying about orgies and the cocaine—I honestly really don’t know. But Madison Cawthorn has lied about so many easily verifiable things, it is hard not to mention it now that he’s being all bible-ey.
CNN confirmed Politico’s report that House Republicans are super bummed out about this “cocaine” and “orgy” talk by the North Carolina Congressman. They also confirmed that Kevin McCarthy said he’s going to talk with Mr. Cawthorn about all of this.
This is the whole interview. Cawthorn flips his hat around to the back and things go even further sideways, around the 18-minute mark. The devil thing is around 19:08.
19 plus 8 is 27.
27 divided by 3 is 9.
9 +9 +9 upside down is 666. Holy shit guys!
And for cleansing your palate of all this muck, the only Warrior Poet worth hearing from.
