Devon Archer, a former business partner of Hunter Biden, testified before the House Oversight Committee on Monday after the Republican Party, from the top down, promised Archer’s testimony would blow the lid off what they have used conspiracy theories to bring into existence: President Joe Biden is the head of an organized crime family. Over the weekend, scumbags like Sen. Ted Cruz stood in front of cameras implying that the Biden administration was “dramatically” changing its story in anticipation of this explosive upcoming testimony.
By all accounts, Archer’s testimony was what the kids call a “bust.” Archer reportedly did testify that Hunter Biden called and even spoke with his famous father on speaker phone in front of both friends and business acquaintances, but according to Archer, they never spoke about business. These phone calls were the social calls a father takes from his son.
Democratic Rep. Dan Goldman spoke with reporters about Archer’s testimony and summed up the desperation of the Republican position, saying that it was “kind of a preposterous premise to think that a father should not say hello to the people that a son is at dinner with and that is literally all the evidence is.” Goldman went on to remind the public that regardless of what the former silent Ohio State University wrestling coach Jim Jordan thinks, Congress is supposed to be doing important work in service of the American people, “and this investigation is a complete waste of time.”
So how are people responding to this unexploded dud?
First up is Goldman summarizing Archer’s testimony to the committee.
Then we have Republican Rep. Andy Biggs, committee and “Freedom Caucus” member, attesting to Goldman’s summary, but in a way one can only describe as a tail between his legs posture.
Fox News’ “The Five” had a hard time shutting down their token liberal member, Jessica Tarlov, because, well, there’s no there there. But Dana Perino did try to finesse a new angle.
Being the liberal voice on Fox News is like trying to build a snowman in July in Arizona. With the facts not on their side, The Five simply began crying louder.
And while Perino attempted to parse words and Jesse Watters tried to do his Bill O’Reilly impression of volume over facts, Rep. Byron Donalds offered up his newest Florida Man-style argument that Archer’s testimony proved the opposite of what was said. Sadly, the only thing Donalds seems to have proven is that it’s probably easier to communicate with your dad if you are Biden’s son rather than if you’re one of Donalds’ kids.
Considering how vague and unfinished conservative thoughts are when it comes to hurling scandal and conspiracy theories around, this tweet might sum it up best.