I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been thinking about what I was going to write tonight since late Tuesday night, when I got home after 16 hours at the polls and it became apparent what was going to happen. Only a week ago I was full of hope and confidence, secure that America could in fact choose competence, hope, joy and a positive future over a convicted felon promising to usher in the Authoritarian Age. But as we know, that did not happen. Americans chose to go with Fascist 2.0, all throughout today we’ve been hearing his picks for a variety of positions, and like most of you I’m wondering why the Holodeck End Program command isn’t working.
My thoughts have been even more jumbled than they often are, flitting and careening between Let’s Plan The Resistance and Let’s Hide Under That Rock. As I posted on social media several times on Wednesday, everything I want to say will get me a time-out or a ban… and despite 1072 diaries and 21280 comments here (and decades on a wide variety of social media sites) I’ve never been time-outed or bojoed from a site so I am NOT starting that now.
So rather than rant into the aether tonight, which lets face it the vast majority of diaries that haven’t been Why Teh Democrats Lose genre have been, I thought I’d share some of what’s been going on this past week.
1. I lost friends on social media: Yes, I ranted on Wednesday. A lot. And I said flatout that Trump voters were racist, sexist, ableist, cruel hypocrites. One man, a Texan I’ve known casually for a decade commented “Sorry, but no I’m not, and I think you know better. I understand you are upset, but I also know that you are better than this.” My response was blunt: “Did you vote for the convicted felon who mocked the disabled, pretended to deepthroat a mic on national tv and talks frequently about shooting his opponents? Because if the answer is yes, then no, I don't know you better. I may have thought I did but I can't trust you because thats what you chose as worthy of the highest office in the United States.” And I asked him to explain WHY he chose the way he did. He unfriended me instead.
2. I stood up to people: I had a longtime male (gee, there seems to be a trend) Libertarian friend with whom I’ve debated politics come into my messages to tell me why he thought the Harris campaign was terrible. I told him (as longtime friends do) to F all the way off. He tried again and I told him that he really needed to stop effing commenting. He said he would stop, and when I was ready to talk to let him know. Since he so graciously gave me agency over my own conversations [/snark], I expected this was the end of it. But NO. He commented the same crap on my social media post. Now, normally I’d delete and move on. But this time, I let my friends see both what he’d said, and also my response: “You messaged me privately to say these things and I told you to stop (strictly speaking, I told you twice to f-ck all the way off.). You said, and I quote, "will not bother you again, until you want to talk". And so you come and comment this on MY post, thus in fact literally bothering me again. What the actual f-ck, dude. Was this a "I'll continue this conversation whether you want it or not" kinda thing?”” Standing up against bullies feels good, y’know? I’m going to keep doing it.
3. I spent time in community: Saturday was my congregation’s annual fundraising Fair. I signed up to work at it, and spent several hours in addition to that talking with friends and congregation members. I also attended a vigil on Wednesday evening where we shared our thoughts and fears, and one of the best church services at this congregation I’ve ever experienced. It left me feeling better… not great, but not stuck in a deep pit.
4. I resolved to be a better privileged ally: I’m not digging out my pussy hat, or sticking a safety pin on my jacket. I may wear a blue bracelet, not because of performative white women dress code ‘allyship’ but because someone dear to me is making them to remind us all of our REAL mission… to be better allies. To witness and intervene when we see injustice to those without privilege. To involve ourselves in making things safer, better, for others.
These are words I heard at church this Sunday...
Do not obey in advance.
My hope, of course, is that those living with privileged identities grieve and then are called to disobey, whatever that means. My hope is that those living with privileged identities grieve and then live their lives reflecting on their privilege and using that power to protect those who are marginalized.
This instruction is different, I believe, for those who are more at risk. Trans people, queer folks, immigrants, people of color - you get to decide your level of risk. Disobey by grieving and reflecting. And then decide what will keep you and your family most safe.
I am absolutely privileged- white, cis, straight-passing, financially secure, extremely well-educated. I have a lot of work to do. Let’s get to it. After the Tops, of course :)
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From AnotherOklahoman:
The discussion was spawned [in tonyahky’s The 4B Movement--women's last option to live in peace and safety?] by my suggestion that lonely poisoned pups (shorthand here) who are total jerks form a program — A-Holes Anonymous to heal themselves. randym77 had a solid solution.
From cohenzee:
I wasn't on Dkos most of yesterday so I missed this reply to my comment in This Carbon Based Life's diary The Monster are Due on Maple Street (my favorite episode), the Twilight Zone episode. TakeSake's one sentence reply to my comment is perfect both for its reference to another Twlight Zone episode and their use of two meanings of the word track.
TOP MOJO
Top Mojo for yesterday (Sunday), November 10th 2024, first comments and tip jars excluded. Thank you mik for the mojo magic! For those of you interested in How Top Mojo Works, please see his diary on FAQing Top Mojo.
And as promised, the CORRECT Top Mojo for Friday, November 8th that we inadvertently oopsed on Saturday aka the server that runs Top Mojo in my attic reset when we updated our router and I didn’t notice, so it didn’t run on Saturday and Friday’s Mojo was used instead.
