Trump needs to get a lot of turnout in order to win in the battleground states. One of his primary demographics that he is currently catering to by going on various podcasts are the DudeBros — the Joe Rogan listeners, alpha male testicle tanners, and the God’s-gift-to-women. So, how can we help them understand that a Trump Presidency will actually be really bad for them to live through? Picture, if you will, a young man playing video games on his couch at home….
SCENE: Interior living room. Neon beer sign is on the wall, and a young man in his mid 20’s is sitting on a threadbare couch, intently focused on the TV in front of him, hands furiously working a game controller. Suddenly his phone on the end table rings. The camera cuts to the phone, which shows the photo of an attractive young woman. The name on the picture says “Hot Stuff”. He sets down the controller and quickly answers, with the camera close up on his face.
DUDEBRO: Hey, Hot Stuff, what’s up?
HOT STUFF: Hi — I think I should come over. We need to —
DUDEBRO: Sweet! I’ll clean the place up a bit and we’ll order some Thai food.
HOT STUFF: Yeah, no, we need to talk. I’m late.
DUDEBRO: Late for what?
HOT STUFF: No, I’m late. As in pregnant.
DUDEBRO: ……..
HOT STUFF: So we’re going to need to talk about prenatal vitamins, cribs, strollers, and how much you want to be involved in her life. I know we didn’t plan for this, but it’s happening.
DUDEBRO: Hold on a second, I’m not ready to be a dad. Can’t we, you know, take care of this?
HOT STUFF: Not since the Trump Supreme court overturned Roe vs Wade, and then the Republican Congress passed a law outlawing abortion where the mother’s life was not in danger. And I’m not flying to Mexico to die in some back alley.
DUDEBRO: Wait, wait, wait, there has to be another way. Isn’t there some sort of morning after pill you can take?
HOT STUFF: You mean a two month after pill? Mifepristone was also banned by Congress via the Comstock Act. Whether we like it or not, you’re going to be a father. Look, I’m going to come over, so we can figure out the finances of raising a kid for the next 18 years. See you soon.
DUDEBRO stares in shock at the phone as HOT STUFF hangs up. The camera pulls away slowly, revealing that his beer sign has been replaced by a Paw Patrol poster, and the room is filled with a crib, diaper boxes, and toys scattered on the floor. He remains in shock as he slowly looks around at the wreckage of his life.
END
Think that will get through to them?
