Like any person with an ounce of human decency (so that excludes VP Vance, of course) I was horrified by the contents of the leaked Republican group chat in Politico. It was awful. Both shocking and the most expected thing at the same time. Disgusting.
I’ve seen a lot of hot takes about how the right talks like this more and more because Trump and his band of immorals have shifted the norms of what it is ok .
I completely agree with that. It is one of the things that worried me a lot with trump 1.0. He was normalizing a way of speaking and thinking that is abhorrent.
And the thing is, we are pack animals. We often talk about how dogs are pack animals, but there is literally no animal on the face of the planet that is more of a pack animal than humans.
And what pack animals do is look to the leader of pack for how to behave.
They don’t do this consciously. But the primitive and powerful part of your brain that keeps you connected to the pack is always looking for what the pack is doing.
So yes, trump normalizing hateful talk and actions sends a message to people that it is ok — and even good — to talk like that.
But that isn’t the lesson I learned from this week’s scandal because we already knew that. We knew that people were behaving in that way. We knew it was awful. And, in a way, it is good to have it out in the open where it can’t be ignored. Trump did this and it is distressing and terrible.
So what lesson did I learn? I was reminded that WE also have the power to change how people behave and talk as well. We have the power to set norms. We have the power to change things.
Because, my friends, it is not just the leader of the pack who people look to when they want to see how to behave.
In fact, with humans, it is rarely the leader. Our packs are so big, that we mostly look to the people around us. We unconsciously alter our behavior in big and small ways based on what we see around us.
Our norms, our behaviors, they influence other people. They teach them what is ok. They teach them what is normal. They push their behaviors.
It is why politicians solicit polls that are skewed to show their candidate is ahead. Because there is a primate part of our brain that wants us to be doing what other people are doing.
And it is why the right is completely terrified of what we are all doing tomorrow.
That is why they have been shit talking the No Kings gatherings with growing anxiety.
They are in a complete panic because, tomorrow, we are changing the norms.
We are showing the rest of the pack that it is NORMAL to be against this government. We are showing the rest of the pack that it is NORMAL to protest against it. We are showing the rest of the pack that it is NORMAL to care about our fellow humans and to care about our democracy. We are showing the rest of the pack that WE are setting the norms. That WE should be followed.
We are setting a norm of decency and democracy and caring and passion and SHOWING UP.
If you can, go to a No Kings protest. You can find one at this link.
Go and be strong. Be peaceful. Be fierce but joyful. Be yourself. Be together.
And take pictures and video and SHARE THEM.
And if you can’t go, SHARE IMAGES that other people provide! Share videos you see online! Share pictures! Research shows that watching those images online can be as powerful as being there in person! Spread the word!
Not only will going change the norms, it may change YOU. Research shows that attending protests leads people to be more optimistic, more energized, more connected, and more likely to fight in the future.
These protests matter. Go and be a part of something amazing.
As always, I am so proud and so lucky to be in this with all of you.
