Our story…
Once upon a time in the Land of Doo’shh there was a boy named Donny. Donny was a stupid boy but in his own mind he was the greatest being that God had ever created. Donny had convinced himself he had special powers. He thought that whatever he wanted, he was entitled to have and everyone else had to give it to him. He thought only HE decided what was true and what was a lie. He thought that if he wanted something to happen, all he had to do was THINK about it and it would magically come to pass. If he wanted his favorite snack of a Double Snot-Burger with extra flies and a supersize cup of Dogslobber, all he had to do was throw a little fit, pounding his tiny little fists on the Resolute Desk crying “Me want! Me want!” and POOF, there it was.
One day, Donny wanted to leave the little round room he was kept in. (round to keep him from peeing in the corner) He called it the Oval Orifice. He liked to say, “There’s a big part of me that’s always in that Beautiful Oval Orifice.” Donny was trying to be naughty but in truth it was just his big fat ass.
Anyway, when Donny tried to leave his little round Toddler Pen he couldn’t. When he tried, he walked straight into the door. Face first. Leaving an ugly, greasy, orange poop stain on the nice white paint. “Why door not open?” he cried. “Me want door open! Door open! DOOR OPEN!” Nothing. Nothing happened. This made Donny sad. Donny began to pout. His bottom lip began to quiver and he drooled ever so slightly. (more than slightly) He started to stamp his feet and when he did, three farts, each one bigger than the last, quacked out of his big butt. This made Donny happy. Donny smiled wide. He liked farts. He wanted more, so he stood very still, bent over a little and tried to squeeze out a bigger fart. He grunted and grunted, his face squinched tight, straining with all of his might when all of a sudden an enormous blast of Executive Orders came flying out of his Imperial Ass of Lard. The room soon filled with the fowl, sickening, green stench of “Trump Breath”. Better known as Sewer Gas. To Donny and his Cabinet of Clowns it was like a breath of fresh air. A sweet fragrance unsurpassed by any rose or violet. But to the Sane People in the room it was the smell of decomposing flesh, of roadside toilet and a shitload of dead skunks left to rot in the summer sun. Gagging violently the Sane People ran for the door, flinging it open and pouring out into the hallway where they collapsed onto the floor, struggling to catch their breath.
Donny was dumbfounded. His natural state. But he was amazed too. How did these strange people, these weird “Saners” get the door to open? Not a one of them had yelled “Door Open!” Not a one had stamped their little feet or pounded their tiny fists or even cried “Me want, ME WANT!” yet the door had somehow opened and they all ran out! This really was magical!
Befuddled by a catatonic stupor caused by the fowl thick green stench of Trump Breath, Donny babbled and blabbered on endlessly demanding to know what Deep State conspiracy had lead to the Magical Opening of the Door. Since it hadn’t opened when he told it to but opened for the Sane People, it had to be a Radical Leftist Terrorist Woke Trans Gay SNAP Biden Late Night TV Host Democrat Conspiracy. Determined to find out who was responsible, so he could fire/furlough/layoff/de-fund and deport them, he called up the National Guard. And ICE. And brought all military personnel above the grade of “Deceased” to The Building formerly known as The White House to catch these criminals. They were most certainly “rapists, murderers, terrorists, mimes, protestors, meme makers and worst of all, immigrants”. Truly the “worst of the worst”. He ordered the DOJ to lead the investigation and committed $40 trillion to get to the bottom of, “the biglyest threat to National Security we have ever seen. Bigger than Pearl Harbor. Bigger than Sept. 11. Abraham Lincoln didn’t have to deal with such a thing. Somebody get me a Snot-Burger.”
When all was said and done, one of the Sane People, a lowly servant, took pity on the Idiot Donny. They explained, or rather tried to explain, the incredibly complicated ‘Principle of a Doorknob’ to Donny Dumbshit. That brings us to where we came in. With the picture above of our dedicated, probably going unpaid because of the shut-down, servant trying to show Donald Trump how a doorknob works. Good luck brave servant. Good luck indeed.
THE END...maybe.
I am on a crusade to show just how truly stupid DJT is. I am new at this and I need some input. Are the pics large enough? Can you read the punchline? Any other suggestions? Thanks.
