Introduction
The following story is a tale of madness in the time of Trump. It features Bradley Bartell, his wife Camila Muñoz, and ICE. Bradley is a native-born American. Muñoz is his Peruvian wife. And ICE is the US Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency — aka Trump's Brown Shirts.
Author's note
MAGA is a cult. I once hesitated to compare MAGA to Nazism and witless cultism. I no longer do. A horde of mindless MAGAs have made it clear they will follow their Dear Leader down every fascist rabbit hole. Like Germans in the 1930s, they have abjured critical thinking. In its place, they have embraced the fantasy that a sociopathic and bombastic boob will guide them to the promised land.
It will not end well for anyone — including the autocrat's most ardent fans — which brings us to Bartell. He is one of these magical thinking dead-enders. Bradley got a taste of life under Trump's incipient dictatorship and still thinks his vote for the wannabe fascist was a good idea — despite ICE arresting his wife and throwing her in lock-up. Where she still is.
The story
Newsweek reported on Bartell's and Muñoz's meeting and matrimony.
In 2019, Muñoz arrived in Wisconsin Dells on a work-study visa, which expired around the time COVID-19 began and international travel came to a standstill. While working in farming and hospitality, she met Bartell, who gave her his number on a scrap of paper—though she initially threw it away.
A few days later, they reconnected on Facebook and soon developed a serious relationship. The couple eventually married, but a honeymoon wasn't possible because of the pandemic.
Not to worry. The honeymoon was delayed but not canceled. The report went on:
In February, Muñoz and Bartell traveled to Puerto Rico to finally take their honeymoon …
But storm clouds were lowering. The report continued:
… and upon returning to the US mainland, immigration agents stopped Muñoz and asked whether she was an American citizen. When she explained that she wasn't but was in the process of obtaining a green card, they detained her. She is being held in an ICE facility in Louisiana.
I am an American husband. If my foreign-born wife (she isn't, but I'm making a point) were arrested and detained by my government, I would be pissed. If I had voted for Trump (I didn't, but see above), I would question whether I had made a good choice.
Bartell does not see it that way. Newsweek writes:
Despite the couple's ordeal, Bartell still supports Trump, who has vowed to conduct the largest mass deportation operation in US history. "I don't regret the vote," Bartell told Newsweek in an exclusive statement.
He described his feelings on the matter:
"It's all been a nightmare really, taking things as they come and moving forward," he said. "We have an attorney. The system for getting people through seems to be very inefficient, so it is taking longer than it should."
Bartell seems unaware that Trump's DOGE cuts are guaranteed to make a process that is already "taking longer than it should" take even longer. I do not know how anyone can be that clueless. But it goes hand-in-hand with his original vote for Trump. The now wifeless husband continued:
"ICE never really has any information, it seems. The system needs to be revamped for better processes and communication between departments."
I am sure he is right about a dysfunctional ICE. It is an organization seemingly staffed with sadists who like guns and power — with little heed paid to hiring professional managers. However, can Bartlett point to anything on DOGE's website about "better processes." There is much self-congratulation about firing people, canceling contracts, and axing disfavored programs. But nothing on improving efficiency.
Even if you support DOGE's purported mission of paring cost, eliminating duplication, and reducing payroll, you cannot give an example of a government department that has improved its task execution after the DOGE locust swarm has passed through.
Bartell, however, acts like every cultist when faced with facts. He ignores them. And clings to his faith in the Cheeto Jesus
"He [Trump] didn't create the system, but he does have an opportunity to improve it. Hopefully, all this attention will bring to light how broken it is."
Although, in a classic case of doublethink, while one side of Bartell’s brain is optimistic all will be solved, the other (let's call it the realistic side) admits that pessimism is the better course.
"It has crossed my mind to move to Peru if she gets deported, but it would be very difficult for my son."
Bartell should also consider ICE's philosophy as outlined by a DHS spokesperson:
"Thanks to President Trump and Secretary Noem, we are once again a nation of laws. We will find, arrest, and deport illegal aliens. We are prioritizing the worst of the worst and aliens with final removal orders.
Secretary Noem's message is clear: If you come to our country illegally, we will deport you, and you will never return. The safest option for illegal aliens is to self-deport, so they still have the opportunity to return and live the American dream."
Trump and Noem have evidently decided that his wife, the unfortunate Muñoz, is either the worst of the worst. Or they were lying then and are now merely plucking the low-hanging fruit to pad their numbers. Either way, if Bartell thinks ICE will become unbroken any time soon he is 14 widgets short of a dozen.
Final thought — more doublethink
Bartell is not a slave to logic. He voted for and still supports a man who has expressed hate, hostility, and disdain for brown-skinned foreigners. Yet, Bradley married one. I wonder which he loves more — his wife or his God?
