C&J 2025 Fundraiser Update
Many thanks from me and our monthly household bills to everyone who contributed to keep Cheers & Jeers alive and kickin' yesterday. The cajole-a-thon is off to a fine start.
When I first started writing this column in 2003, it was a meager attempt to participate in this exciting new phenomenon called “blogging.” I had shit to get off my chest about the Iraq War (Bad!), Howard Dean (Good!), and the Bush II administration (Hopeless!), and when it started gaining readership after a few months I knew this was my chance to become a powerful oligarch, possibly one with my own navy.
It instead became a pleasant morning wake-up column. Easy to skim through, political but nothing too deep. A good way to plant your feet on the ground and get your neurons up-shifted from a foggy shuffle to a brisk jog with an unlimited IV drip of ripple. And thanks to your kind donations over the years, we’ve moved up from an apartment to an apartment that now has a rug in it, but watch your step or you’ll probably step in cat vomit.
If you'd like to own a piece of my (gluten-free, non-acidic, but definitely made in a facility that processes nuts) soul for 2025, here are the various options via PayPal:
One time contribution: click here.
$5 monthly contribution: click here
$10 monthly contribution: click here
$20 monthly contribution: click here
-
To send a donation via snail mail:
Bill Harnsberger, 16 Pitt Street, Portland, ME, 04103.
If you're already a C&J monthly subscriber through PayPal:
You don’t have to do anything but make sure your card is still active and then feel good about your excellent investment.
21 years of polling consistently shows that C&J delivers the best bad snark on the internet, along with regular features like Energize An Ally Tuesday, invaluable Wednesday updates on how close we are to the Rapture, Thursday Molly Ivins Moments, the Friday Who Won the Week poll, and free playful hair tousling. Plus a merry band of commenters who make the place feel like the best kind of neighborhood bar: the kind that opens at 7:50 in the morning. Thanks for supporting it.
And now, our feature presentation...
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, April 29, 2025
Note: C&J's designated NSA tracker Bart will be monitoring us for the next 48 hours from inside the Maypole we set up next to the kiddie pool. He politely asks that you don’t bang on it with something large like a monkey wrench. We politely ask that you do. —Mgt.
-
By the Numbers:
3 days!!!
Days 'til Mother's Day: 12
Days 'til the Community School’s Strawberry Festival in Roanoke, Virginia: 3
Percent of Americans polled by Reuters/Ipsos (including 53% of Republicans) who believe the current orange shitbag in the White House should not try to steal a third term: 75%
Estimated amount Elon Musk's pimple-faced DOGE minions have spent trying to root out a predicted $2 trillion in wasteful government spending: $135 billion
Amount DOGE has actually found in supposed wasteful spending (not including their own $135 billion): $160 billion
Longest papal conclave in history, preceding the election of Pope Gregory X in 1271: 34 months
Rank of Miami Hurricane Cam Ward among 2025 NFL draft picks (chosen by the Tennessee Titans): #1
-
Puppy Pic of the Day: After 500+ days wandering in the Australian wilderness…Saved!!!
-
CHEERS to dirty fucking hippies: Ottawa Edition. I'm writing this on a random note pad yesterday morning and sealing it in a package of microwaveable poutine so it can't be tampered with until this very moment, which at the time I wrote it was still tomorrow morning but now it's today—aka The Moment Of Truth. This is a demonstration of the kind of confidence you can have when a fascist U.S. president actively meddles in the election, by threatening to subjugate them by force, of a people who dearly love their parliamentary democracy as it is. Ladies and gentlemen, my freshly-unsealed and bold prediction from 24 hours ago (Mmmm...smell that heavenly gravy):
Nailed it!!! Carney, who took the reins from Justin Trudeau last month, will re-assume the office for a full term sometime after pledging his allegiance to the King of England (somebody wake up Charles) and then taking the oath on a stack of Celine Dion's greatest hits.
JEERS to getting down to the people's business. And since this item is about the Republican-led Congress, the people we’re talking about are, of course, very rich ones. This week the House, with input from the thinking-bigly-with-their-headbones economic team at the White House, starts worming tyranny throughout their "Big, Beautiful" plan to cut taxes for the rich while cutting everything else for everyone else. Oh boy:
After a two-week recess marked by some heated encounters with constituents back home, Republican lawmakers in the House of Representatives are due to begin debating and voting on segments of Trump's agenda legislation that would also fund his crackdown on immigration and bolster fossil fuel production and military spending. […]
And away we go...
The budget blueprint for Trump's agenda could add $5.8 trillion [in tax cuts for the rich] to the $36 trillion U.S. debt in the next decade, the nonpartisan Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget estimates. Republicans claim the cost will be covered by a combination of spending cuts, higher economic growth and revenues from energy deregulation and Trump's tariffs. […]
The budget blueprint contained no details about spending cuts. Now Republicans must grapple with changes that carry tangible consequences for their home districts.
Anonymous reports from inside the West Wing say that differences will be settled in the newly-built White House gladiator arena, formerly known as the Rose Garden. I'm told they'll fight it out with Nerf tridents. (They'd use real ones but they don't want to mess up their manicures.)
CHEERS to exactly the right word. 173 years ago, Roget's Thesaurus was first published. And for that I am truly—[flip flip flip]—“grateful; thankful; affording pleasure or comfort; fulfilled; appreciative; obliged; down with that; sweet on it; fist bump-ready; engorged with the sweet nectar of gratification in a small cabin in Saskatchewan where the only sound is the bugling of the elk.” Just a hunch, but I think Roget might’ve been lonely.
-
BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
-
END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
-
JEERS to Nazi Nuptials. With Russian artillery booming in the background, Adolf and Eva got hitched in der Fuhrerbunker 80 years ago today. Instead of a ring, Hitler presented his bride with an Iron Cross, and it pretty much went downhill after that. By the way, the 80th anniversary present for a dead Nazi is 80 more centuries in the deepest circle of Hell. And no fresh lemon wedges to squeeze over their schnitzel.
CHEERS to today's edition of We're All Pointing And Laughing At You, Dickhead—Yeah, Even Melania. Courtesy of ABC News:
Donald Trump has the lowest 100-day job approval rating of any president in the past 80 years, with public pushback on many of his policies and extensive economic discontent, including broad fears of a recession, according to a new ABC News/Washington Post/Ipsos poll.
39 percent of respondents in this ABC News/Washington Post/Ipsos poll said they approve of how Trump is handling his job as president, down 6 points from February, while 55% said they disapprove.
The previous low in approval for a president at or near 100 days in office, in polls dating to 1945, was Trump's 42% in 2017.
This has been today's edition of We're All Pointing And Laughing At You, Dickhead—Yeah, Even Melania.
-
Ten years ago in C&J: April 30, 2015
CHEERS to Eric Holder. After months of delays over Loretta Lynch's confirmation, he gave his final farewell speech Friday, saying…
"I'm going to miss you.
I am going to miss this building.
I am going to miss this institution.
More than anything, I am going to miss you all."
He added, "Especially you, Scarecrow. I'm going to miss you mostest. And my stapler. And this lamp. I love lamp!!!" In case it needs to be said, there was an open bar.
-
And just one more…
CHEERS to U.S. Mint'y freshness. The new American Women Quarter is here! The new American Women Quarter is here! Yes indeed, the latest in the series of U.S. quarters celebrating accomplished American women was released, and she's a MAGA cultist's nightmare because she’s a trailblazer with lady parts who taught girls how to be lady trailblazers, too:
Juliette Gordon Low, is making her mark on American currency. [On March 25] the United States Mint released the Juliette Gordon Low special edition quarter which is one of five final quarters being released through the American Women Quarters Program.
Not to be confused with Bea Arthur dressed as a leprechaun.
The selection of Juliette Gordon Low for this prestigious honor on the national stage serves as a powerful reminder that her visionary spirit and the Movement she founded are beacons of hope for every girl. And today, the world needs Girl Scouts more than ever.
Low’s legacy comes to life in every Girl Scout and alum who speaks up for what they believe in, leaves the world better than they found it, and blazes a trail of their very own. Juliette Gordon Low's journey from trailblazing leader to a face on our nation's currency is a testament to the power of girls and women everywhere.
Gordon Low is the second graduate of the U.S. Mint's Class of '25. C&J will keep you posted on the next honoree ahead of her arrival. It'll give normal people time to learn more about these trailblazing women, and misogynists time to plan their DEI-related tantrums.
Have a tolerable Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
-
Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
"Most acid reflux can be alleviated with changes in behavior. This can include avoiding certain items such as fried or spicy food, alcohol, tobacco, and Cheers and Jeers."
—Dr. Brijen Shah
-
