In the dead of Scandinavian winter, a bipartisan group of U.S. lawmakers has trundled off to Denmark to say that, no, you totally should not listen to President Donald Trump about how he wants to invade Greenland, and it’s all going to be totally fine—trust us.
Of course, the big, declining toddler president’s desire to eat Greenland just because he can has been kicking around for a while now, but things got especially dicey Thursday after Vice President JD Vance hosted a meeting between Denmark and the White House.
Vice President JD Vance and second lady Usha Vance arrive in Greenland on March 28, 2025.
You would have thought that Vance could have fixed everything, what with his native charm and his past visit to Greenland. You know the one, where he did some tough talk about how much Denmark sucked?
“Our message to Denmark is very simple: you have not done a good job by the people of Greenland. You have under invested in the people of Greenland, and you have under invested in the security architecture of this incredible, beautiful landmass filled with incredible people. That has to change, and because it hasn’t changed, this is why President Trump’s policy in Greenland is what it is,” he said at the time.
On Wednesday, the two sides had agreed to create a working group to address Trump’s acquisitiveness. But by Thursday, the White House seemed to have forgotten the deal, with press secretary Karoline Leavitt telling reporters that a delegation from both Denmark and Greenland agreed “to continue to have technical talks on the acquisition of Greenland.”
It’s like they are congenitally incapable of telling the truth or of understanding that other people can also talk to the press.
Denmark’s Minister for Foreign Affairs Lars Lokke Rasmussen said that, nope, we meant what we said: We’ll have a working group to figure out whether there’s a common way forward “to address the American security concerns in relation to Greenland.”
So now Denmark gets to host Democratic Sen. Chris Coons of Delaware, GOP Sens. Lisa Murkowski of Alaska and Thom Tillis of North Carolina, and Democratic Rep. Steny Hoyer of Maryland as they all try to unring the dumb bell that Trump keeps clanging.
We’re at what is now a standard stage of Trump aggression—the one where Republicans pretend that they’ll defy Trump, just you wait and see.
GOP Sen. Lisa Murkowski of Alaska
Murkowski told reporters in Copenhagen that she had an important message for Denmark, which is that we have three branches of government.
“In Congress, we have tools at our disposal under our constitutional authority that speaks specifically to the power of the purse through appropriations,” she said.
Do you think Murkowski realizes that they have newspapers and television and the internet in Denmark and have seen the GOP gleefully hand over the power of the purse to Trump? Is she just hoping no one noticed?
Meanwhile, Tillis wants us all to know he’s mad as hell—but that it’s totally not Trump’s fault. He’s just getting bad advice, and Tillis is here to protect him.
On the Senate floor Wednesday, Tillis relayed what he had told Trump: “If I prove anything else to you in the next year and a half, I hope I will prove to you that I care about your legacy and you have people around you who don’t.”
Man, have some self-respect.
Meanwhile, GOP Rep. Don Bacon of Nebraska boldly declared that he would “lean” toward impeaching Trump, but only after Trump orders a military invasion of Greenland.
“If he went through with the threats, I think it would be the end of his presidency. And he needs to know: The off-ramp is realizing Republicans aren’t going to tolerate this and he’s going to have to back off,” he said.
GOP Sen. Thom Tillis of North Carolina
Come on, buddy. Republicans have shown that they will tolerate pretty much anything from Trump. Also, your big plan is to just sit on your hands until he mounts an invasion and then get around to dealing with it? So brave.
It’s tough to take any of this seriously after watching GOP Sens. Josh Hawley of Missouri and Todd Young of Indiana absolutely cave, flipping their votes on a war powers resolution to rein in Trump’s attacks on Venezuela.
Hawley and Young, pathetic through and through, justified their flip by saying that, gosh, Secretary of State Marco Rubio pinky promised that the administration would be totally constitutional—for real, you guys—and will totally ask for congressional authorization next time.
Meanwhile, Trump spent Friday afternoon refusing to commit to not attacking a NATO ally, which kind of undercuts the whole friendly delegation to Denmark thing that lawmakers are going for.
Republicans are kidding themselves if they think they’re going to be able to distract Trump with a different shiny object, as he’s clearly pretty fixated on Greenland.
They’re also kidding themselves if they think they’re genuinely going to try to stop him.
