This diary is written with a heavy heart.  I have changed the name of the young woman to protect her identity.  The conversation was real.

This past week my daughter and her friends were out riding their bikes.  They do it in packs.  They work on their tans while flirting with the guys on the bike paths.  They all have part time jobs and are full time students at the University here in town.  They will all be sophomores this Fall semester.

After this last bike ride, Jen came into the kitchen for some water.  Our conversation went like this.

Me:  "What classes will you be taking this Fall?"

Jen: "I'm not going back to school."

Me:  "Why?"

Jen:  "I have enlisted."

Me:  "What?  Enlisted?  When did you do that and why?"

Jen:  "A couple of weeks ago.  I start basic training soon.  I'll be gone for 8 weeks and then they are sending me to culinary school."

Me:  "How long is your commitment?"

Jen:  "Eight years.  But I only have to serve one weekend a month after I finish culinary school."

Me:  "Do you know what a stop loss is?"

Jen:  "No."

I was blown away by what she had just told me.  I didn't expect to hear this from her.

Me:  "What does your Mom think about this?"

Jen: "I didn't tell her until after I had committed."

Me:  "What?  You didn't talk with your Mom before you enlisted?"

Jen:  "No.  I told her afterward."

Me:  "What did she say?  Was she floored?"

Jen:  "She didn't know what to say."

My heart really started to hurt at this point.  I am sure her Mom was devastated.  I know I would have been.

Me:  "Well, you are an adult and need to be responsible for your own decisions now.  But did you read the contract before you signed it?"

Jen:  "Yeah, I read it."

Me:  "Did you understand it?"

Jen:  "I think so."

She thought so.  This young woman who has bussed tables for the past 3 years entered into an agreement with the military thinking she understood what she signed.

Me:  "Did you consult with any adult you trusted before you signed the papers?"

Jen:  "No.  But I know what I am doing."

Me:  "Do you know there is a very good probability that you will be deployed?  One of my very best friend's husbands is in the National Guard and he was given the choice of going to Iraq or Guantanamo.  He has some seniority over a new recruit so he got to choose."

Jen:  "I am not worried about it.  They said I would be studying culinary arts before I knew it."

Before she knows it.  

Me:  "Haven't you heard the talk about war with Iran?"

Jen:  "No."

She doesn't know.

Me:  "Please come by before you leave.  I would like to say goodbye."

Jen:  "I will."

Realistically I probably won't get to see her before she leaves for basic.  Who knows when I'll see her again.  What I do know is that the next time I see her she will be a changed person.  And if she gets deployed she will come home a different person.

I don't know what the recruiter told her.  I don't know why she felt she had to leave school and enlist.  But my heart is heavy because another young American will become a soldier and be confronted with the ugliness of rage and war. I hope she gets to go to culinary school but my head tells me different.  My friend's husband was deployed several months ago and he hasn't been told when he will get to come home.

Joining the National Guard is an honorable thing to do.  But serving now, for this administration, and under the guise of this ugly occupation in Iraq, is truly heartbreaking.  

After all the t's are crossed and the i's dotted, they really don't just serve one weekend per month in the National Guard anymore.