I feel that's what is missing from George Lakoff's list of values.
It all started when I saw a comment just saying "Lafuckoff". Now, that's a great way of starting the conversation. I thought this person was framing the messenger because she did not want to deal with the message. I rated her a troll (for posting a non constructive, gut-feeling deprecating remark).
Her answer was "I've been here longest, I can say comments like 'Lafuckoff' and rant if I want to. You're fairly new, so don't you dare tell me I'm a troll when I said that."
So, even in the haven of blogs and circulating ideas, from those who advocate free speech, tolerance is a core value which is hard to live by.
And I thought - my, I just thought I was treating that comment equally to the others. Why should I take into consideration that person's history? Or has Kos become an aristocracy, where lining in the threads allows you to be immune to the rest of the community's rating? And it's really bad, because that person's comments were constructive and interesting most of the time. I really liked some of the diaries, and found them useful. But I still think that comment deserved a 1. And that I shouldn't be put down for saying it.
Anyway, this is what made me think about a core value that I thought was missing from Lakoff's list: tolerance.
Because tolerance reminds you that you believe in treating everyone fairly and equally.
Because tolerance reminds you that you can't clone yourself and expect everyone to agree with you on every single point.
Because tolerance reminds you that you have no right tell someone else what they should do with their body or mind.
My story is the reason why I thought it should be related to strength. It takes a lot of strength to be tolerant and understanding. It takes patience and it is a very tiring exercise of the mind. It takes empathy and a will to negotiate a way out of differences.
And I'm sure many of you out there have found yourselves cussing at the screen many times (if you haven't, try reading Free Republic on a regular basis :-p ).
So here's my small contribution to progressive values: talking about tolerance.
