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Are they even trying?
A new group that hopes to tap into a rising appetite for a third-party presidential challenger has discovered that $30 million in secret cash can buy ballot access and attention, but not necessarily a dream candidate.
The group, Americans Elect, failed to generate interest in possible campaigns from Sens. Joe Lieberman and Lamar Alexander, and its intensive outreach to a host of other prospective candidates, including former Nebraska Sens. Chuck Hagel and Bob Kerrey, hasn’t yielded much public enthusiasm for its efforts.
So, um ... they can't find a candidate who actually wants to run for them. They've also tried Jon Huntsman, who also said meh, so it seems they've run the gamut of old politically connected white guys known either for being conservative Republicans, conservative Democrats, or conservative used-to-be Democrats. Well, that's certainly a broad swath. And so bold! So bipartisan! So oh my God this is so dull I want to gouge my eyes out just to prove to myself I can feel pain again!
You know who would work out well for them, in terms of being a well-known white guy known for ridiculous conservative stances? Steven Colbert. Oh, wait:
Meanwhile, supporters of the group are taking heat for provisions aimed at preventing their process from being hijacked by a figure like Comedy Central satirist Stephen Colbert, who announced Thursday night that he plans to explore a run for “president of the United States of America of South Carolina.”
Damn it. Apparently there's also a you-have-to-actually-mean-this-stuff clause.
I really, really hate these faux-third-party organizations. Their version of bipartisanship just happens to track closely with Wall Street-humping fiscal conservatism—go figure—and their supposedly grassroots credentials are just sad. I know I'm supposed to have something funny or insightful to say here, but I just don't. It's lazy false bipartisanship of the Broder/Brooks "oh why can't we all get along so I don't have to have an actual opinion" variety, bought and paid for by the same moderate business conservative crowd that finances every other one of these stupid "grassroots" lets-fix-government-by-all-being-conservative-together efforts.
Americans Elect is the McDonald's value meal of democracy, and I don't mean that as a good thing. It's good to see that even their prospective candidates are smart enough to not actually want to be associated with them.