Monday Night Cancer Club is a Daily Kos group focused on dealing with cancer, primarily for cancer survivors and caregivers, though clinicians, researchers, and others with a special interest are also welcome. Volunteer diarists post Monday evenings between 8-9 PM ET on topics related to living with cancer, which is very broadly defined to include physical, spiritual, emotional and cognitive aspects. Mindful of the controversies endemic to cancer prevention and treatment, we ask that both diarists and commenters keep an open mind regarding strategies for surviving cancer, whether based in traditional, Eastern, Western, allopathic or other medical practices. This is a club no one wants to join, in truth, and compassion will help us make it through the challenge together.
Anyone who has been through it, themselves or with a loved one, knows about "cancer head" (as I have heard it referred to). The immediate instinct to ascribe anything that is wrong, or twinges to cancer recurrence. In many ways this is justified, given the odds of recurrence, and having survived the ultimate betrayal by ones own body, ones own cells running amok. I recently confronted just such an episode, and detail it below, for the edification of myself and any chance reader.
As some know, I was diagnosed with Renal cancer in early 2009, and it was treated primarily with a right radical nephrectomy on March 31 of that year. An equal number probably also know that I had to confront the existence of the cancer without a confirmed diagnosis for about 6 months prior, due to the vagaries of the US healthcare "system" and some other outside forces... (for more on this, consult the as yet unpublished diary, "confessions of an unwilling lurker").
Perhaps this period of paniced activity has in someway clouded my judgement, and makes me see neo-plasm around every corner, and below each age spot, but I suspect the experience is probably more common than that, and my own life for the past 2 months or so was not at all an aberration.
For the past 15 or 16 months, I had been in some significant pain, had episodic double vision (around 40% of the time), and had been suffering from severe exhaustion. The terrifying thing was these were all symptoms that I had experienced just before my surgery, and they largely disappeared with the surgery.
According to Farmerterri, the first words out of my mouth in the recovery room were "My penis hurts and I can see things clearly".
Of course, I had lost my health insurance during this period, as I had gotten a job, and was making too much (200 dollars/month too much) to qualify for the states subsidized insurance, and FAR to little to be able to afford pre-existing coverage under ACA (almost 600/month with very high deductible). Interestly enough, I could not find any doctor that would see me without having health insurance, not that I would have been able to pay for tests or imaging in any case, but that is a diary for a different day.
Long story short, I was finally able to get my health insurance re-instated on May second, and in quick succession was fast tracked into seeing 4 doctors, 2 rounds of imaging, many blood tests, and a quick out patient surgery, to biopsy and remove a small "mass". I am very happy to announce, that the cancer has not come back, the mass was benign (got the call about 4 hours ago), and on the neo-plastic front all is well.
SO.... the obvious question is, why am I sharing all this....don't I have anything better to do with my time than to bother all of you dear readers with the travails of a not very interesting character?
The answer to that is, I didn't get a completely clear bill of health. It was discovered that I have had diabetes for some period of time. And therein lies the lesson that I learned, and wish to share.
With a major health threat, like cancer, it is very easy to regard anything that ISN'T cancer as trivial, or to spend so much time and effort looking for cancer, or treating cancer, or just assuming that every symptom is either cancer or Neo-plastic Syndrome, that you miss what is actually wrong. Looking back at my medical records, the diabetes has been present for almost 3 years, although masked by the fast and IV's while i was in the hospital. The lack of communications between doctors, in many cases is astounding. Likewise the specialization of many Doctors results in them being little better than laymen outside their specialty.
This was my take-home, and thus endeth the lesson.