JON STEWART: So congratulations, Congress, it sure as hell ain't amnesty. But by creating this path to citizenship, you finally built a barrier that immigrants will not be able to get past. For more, we turn to Senior Immigration Correspondent Al Madrigal. Al, thanks for joining us. Let me ask you, is this immigration bill, is it really going to help its intended beneficiaries?Video and full transcript below the fold.
AL MADRIGAL: Jon, I think it's going to be difficult, but I do also think that comprehensive immigration reform could help take these people out of the shadows, and put them back on a path to presidentship.
JON STEWART: I'm sorry, say that again?
AL MADRIGAL: Look, Jon, clearly Republicans think they have to reach out to Latinos, to regain a chance to occupy the Casa Blanca. That's why Latinos are setting tough but fair conditions for Republicans to meet. Passing immigration reform is just the beginning.
JON STEWART: Well, what comes next for them?
AL MADRIGAL: For starters, they're going to have to go at least 10 years without saying something like this.REP. DON YOUNG, R-AK (3/26/2013): My father had a ranch. We used to hire 50 or 60 wetbacks to pick tomatoes.AL MADRIGAL: Now, unless Don Young is referring to the many children of Alastair and Catherine von Wetback, of the New England von Wetbacks, that ain't cool. And, I'm not just talking national politicians. I'm also talking about mayors who brush off Latino racial profiling cases with comments like this.
1/22/2012:(audience groans in disgust)
MARIO DIAZ, WPIX: What are you doing for the Latino community today?
EAST HAVEN MAYOR JOSEPH MATURO JR., R-CT: I might have tacos when I go home, I'm not quite sure yet.
AL MADRIGAL: Might have tacos? Might? If you can think of a better way of delivering beef, lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, and beans, and a crispy or soft shell depending on your preference, you're welcome to try, taco mayor!
JON STEWART: What about a burrito?
AL MADRIGAL: It's delicious too! How is that the point?
JON STEWART: So is that it? Is that the conditions to put Republicans back on the path to presidentship?
AL MADRIGAL: No! No, it's not it. Republicans must also stop using "Hispanic" to refer to all Latinos, OK? They'll now just have to distinguish between Mexicans, Guatemalans, Hondurans, Dominicans, Kardashians....
JON STEWART: Actually... I don't think Kardashians are Latino.
AL MADRIGAL: What? Kardashians aren't Latino? Then how do you explain their butts?
JON STEWART: I don't know.
AL MADRIGAL: Go ahead, Jon. Explain the Kardashians' butts.
JON STEWART: (Jon ponders) No. Look, if the Republican Party does all the things that you've listed, are Latinos then willing to consider putting Republicans back on the path to presidentship, amnesty or not?
AL MADRIGAL: Yes. Well, with one final requirement. They must guess what number I'm thinking of. Between, I dunno, let's say, one and a million.
JON STEWART: That's impossible.
AL MADRIGAL: Not impossible. But, like the path to citizenship that they're offering, might take a little while.
JON STEWART: Thank you, Al. Al Madrigal, everybody. We'll be right back.
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