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Ever have pickle juice squirted in your ear?
Last month a pregnant waitress asked another one why there were so many pregnancies in the restaurant this year. "There must be something in the water." The other waitress replied, "It isn't in the water, it is in the pickle juice." Monday night the pickle juice came squiritng out of a young squirt's straw and straight into my ear.
Don't want to read the diary before commenting? Just click on the Bei Mir Bistu Shein video below instead. The second half especially illustrates perfectly what I'm talking about. Btw, I'm Laurel and Hardy in the video, not one of the divas.
[Btw, here's the reggae version of the same song, but without the descriptive video illustrating the cluster boo-boo.]
It is a true story, but filled with petty hurt fee-fees on my part, lol. Last night a Klezmer band filled with scatter-brained divas came into work and immediately turned the whole place upside down. It was both hilarious to watch and absolutely maddening at the same time. Could've been directed by Mel Brooks and titled Young Klezmerstein. Pure accidental slapstick resulting in muchos hurt fee-fees all around. Everyone lost their temper and misbehaved. It was like organized chaos, but without the organized part. If I can find something positive in the whole debacle I'll write on it in either tomorrow's or Saturday's New Day.
The place is packed. Everyone is seated according to how close they want to sit to the band. The divas then arrive and announce they don't like the set-up of where they're supposed to be playing from. They don't want to be in front of the piano. They want to move to the other end of the large room. I tell them, "the owner no likey change." Oh, The main diva comes up to me, and while batting her eyes wildly, tells me how urgent it is that they move. I respond again, "the owner no likey change." I then committed the mortal sin of leaving the room for a few moments. When I come back hell is already ablaze.
Up the ladder goes Marilyn....
In my absence the main diva convinces the busser to bring out a fifteen-foot ladder to reach the only outlet-near the ceiling-on the other side of the room. It looks like the raising of the flag at Guadalcanal, with one of the divas perilously perched atop the ladder. Her skirt is flying this way and that as the ladder sways. Customers
look up and have little to wonder about. Family restaurant. The first plate of the night drops to the floor as a waiter attempts to avoid the moving throng at the ladder's bottom while simultaneously watching startling 'events' at the top of the ladder.
Bei Mir Bistu Shein (translation, "My, you're grand.")
I just stop dead in my tracks and shake my head. "No, no, no...."
Things went downhill from there.
Since the band had moved, most of the customers got up and were changing tables to either get closer or further from the band. Half had already ordered, and no one now knew where to take the food that was coming up. Now the divas announce that the outlet is dead. It has no power. They now try to relocate back to their original location on the other side of the restaurant, as the customers are moving back and forth and the waiters are trying to find out where their customers moved to and as the busser clumsily moves about futilely with the fifteen foot ladder trying to get it out of the room and 93-year old Max with his wife and his walker try to reach a seat and a group of five children are dancing in the aisles and....
"No, no, no."
In the midst of the breakdown of all semblance of order, I see the owner come in. I approach him to seek a balanced and calm head, and only to be surprised by him suddenly angrily yell at a customer, "Haven't you ever been in a fucking restaurant before?" Oops. No balance is going to be restored to the force from that direction. I'm quickly trying to think what to say to the owner when I hear laughter next to me and feel something wet enter my ear. One of the none dancing kids had sucked up pickle juice in his straw and decided, I guess, to see if he could take my eye out. He wasn't successful. He got my ear instead.
Things continued downhill from there.
Finally set-up back at their original position, the divas then blow their amp out-after doing the same for many eardrums in the restaurant. The working socket is 240 volts and they didn't have a converter. Someone's husband was sent to get another amp. I go turn the pre-programmed music CD back on and collapse on top of an empty milk crate. Then I wisely just gave up.
Bei Mir Bistu Shein....
The "suggestion box" was full at the end of the night. I had two myself. First, wear undergarments while performing in public. Second, just stay home some nights.
Latest Updates on Kossack Regional Meet-Up News Below the New Day sunrise cloud
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:: COMMUNITY BUILDING UPDATES ::
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Let's build communities!
Every region needs a meatspace community like SFKossacks.
We take care of each other in real life.
I urge YOU to take the lead and organize one in your region.
Please tell us about it if you do and we're here for advice.
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THINK GLOBALLY, ACT LOCALLY
>>>Instructions on HOW TO FORM A NEW DAILY KOS GROUP
NEW GROUPS IN THE PROCESS OF ORGANIZING:
Send a Kosmail to the organizers and ask for an invitation to the group.
• Northern Indiana Area: Kosmail Tim Delaney
• Long Island: Kosmail grannycarol
• Northern Michigan: Kosmail JillS
• Nebraska: Kosmail Nebraska68847Dem
• Westburbia Chicago Kossacks: Kosmail Majordomo
• Caprock Kossacks (Panhandle/Caprock/Lubbock/Amarillo area) : Kosmail shesaid
• West Texas Kossacks (including Big Bend Region and El Paso) : Kosmail Yo Bubba
• Las Vegas Kossacks: Kosmail miracle11
• Vermont Kossacks: Kosmail 4Freedom
Note to the above new leaders: Feel free to leave a comment any day reminding readers about your new group. Also, tell us about your progress in gathering members. Kosmail me when you've chosen a good name for your group and have created a the group. Then I'll move you to the NEW GROUPS LIST. When you've planned a date for your first event I'll make a banner for you to highlight your event in our diaries and your diaries.
These are the groups that have started since * NEW DAY * began. Please Kosmail navajo if you have started a group before that.
NEW GROUPS LIST:
• California Central Valley Kossacks - Formed: Jul 29, 2012, Organizer: tgypsy
• New England Kossacks - Formed: Aug 6, 2012, Organizers:
Clytemnestra for Lower New England (Conneticut, Massachusetts, Rhode Island)
nhox42 for Upper New England (Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont)
• Houston Area Kossacks - Formed: Aug 7, 2012, Organizer: Chrislove
• Kossacks in India - Formed: Aug 14, 2012, Organizer: chandu
• CenTex Kossacks - Formed: Sep 9, 2012, Organizer: papa monzano
• Central Ohio Kossacks - Formed: Sep 26, 2012, Organizer: VetGrl
• Kansas City Kossacks - Formed Oct 15, 2012, Organizer: [Founder stepped down]
• Phoenix Kossacks - Formed Oct 16, 2012, Organizer: arizonablue
• Chicago Kossacks - Formed: Oct 31, 2012, Organizer: figbash
• Koscadia the Pacific Northwest coast from Northern California to Alaska
- Formed Oct 17, 2012, Oganizer: Horace Boothroyd III based in Portland, OR
• Boston Kossacks - Formed: Nov 7, 2012, Organizer: GreyHawk
• Motor City Kossacks South East Michigan (Detroit) Area - Formed: Nov 10, 2012, Organizer: peregrine kate
• Pittsburgh Area Kossacks - Formed: Nov 12, 2012, Organizer: dweb8231
• Salt Lake City Kossacks - Formed: Nov 17, 2012, Organizer: War on Error
• Twin Cities Kossacks - Formed: Nov 17, 2012, Organizer: imonlylurking
• Dallas Kossacks North Texas - Formed: Nov 21, 2012, Admins: Catte Nappe and dalfireplug. Please contact them to join the group. An Event Organizer needed.
• The Southern California Inland Empire Kossacks - Formed: Dec 3, 2012, Organizer: SoCaliana
• Los Angeles Kossacks - Formed: Dec 17, 2012, Organizer: Dave in Northridge
• Northeast Ohio Kossacks - Formed: Jan 16, 2013, Organizer: GenXangster
• Kansas & Missouri Kossacks - Formed: Jan 17, 2013, Organizer: tmservo433
• I-77 Carolina Kossacks who live from Columbia, SC to north of Winston-Salem, NC. - Formed: Jan 30, 2013, Organizers: gulfgal98 and eeff
• Indianapolis Kossacks - Formed: Feb 6, 2013, Organizer: CityLightsLover
• Southwest Ohio Kossacks - Formed: May 10, 2013, Organizer: Dr Erich Bloodaxe RN
• Northern Arizona Kossacks - Formed: Jul 5, 2013, Organizer: Sam Sara
• Mexican Kossacks - Formed: Apr 14, 2013, Organizer: roberb7
• New York Hudson Valley Kossacks - Formed: Oct 27, 2012, Organizer: boran2
• North Carolina Triangle Kosmopolitans - Formed: Aug 2, 2013, Organizer: highacidity
• Silicon Valley Kossacks - Formed: Oct 31, 2013, Organizer: Glen The Plumber
• Seattle and Puget Sound Kossacks - Formed: Dec 17, 2013, Organizer: EagleOfFreedom
ESTABLISHED GROUPS LIST: (List will grow as we discover them)
• SFKossacks Founded by navajo, Formed: May 2, 2005
• Maryland Kos Founded by timmyc, Formed: Feb 23, 2011. Contact: JamieG from Md for a group invite.
• New York City Founded by Eddie C - Contact the group organizer for meet-up events: sidnora
• Baja Arizona Kossacks, Event Organizer: Azazello
• Three Star Kossacks Tennessee, Founded by maryKK, Formed: Apr 8, 2011
• Nashville KosKats, Founded by ZenTrainer Formed: Jan 30, 2012
• Virginia Kos Founded by JamieG from Md, Formed: May 3, 2011
• Kos Georgia Founded by pat208, Formed: Feb 13, 2011
• Colorado COmmunity Founded by Leftcandid, Formed: Feb 13, 2011
• New Mexico Kossaks Founded by claude
• Philly Kos Founded by mconvente Formed: Aug 29, 2011
• DKos Florida Founded by ThirstyGator, Formed: Feb 14, 2011, Currently organizing: Kosmail Vetwife to be included in next event.
• Oklahoma Roundup Founded by BigOkie, Formed: Feb 13, 2011, Currently organizing: Kosmail peacearena to be included.
• DKos Asheville Founded by davehouck, Formed: Feb 13, 2011 - Organizing Assist by: randallt
• San Diego Kossacks Founded by La Gitane, Formed: Nov 18, 2011
• Massachusetts Kosmopolitans Founded by mem from somerville, Formed: Feb 13, 2011
by peregrine kate ♥ for Motor City Kossacks
A polar vortex could not stop six Motor City Kossacks from getting together on January 4th. Kudos, all! ACA Daily Kos celebrity, Brainwrap attended and brought the group up to date on his work.
Even folks from the White House are quoting his figures now. He also observed how odd he thought it was that the mainstream media (and governmental) sources were 1) not talking to him directly, seemingly content to take his numbers as valid, and 2) not conducting similar statistical aggregations on their own. We shared his astonishment, but agreed that he is doing an important job.
Also in attendance were prolific diarist BFSkinner, user ID 162795 and has been around since long before 2008. Amber6541, famous pootie/woozle diarist with an old user ID of 157580 and sydneyluv, who beat them all with the user ID of 132330. Long timers, these three!
Discussion included Michigan's crucial statewide elections in 2014 and the need to displace Rick "the Nerd" Snyder.
As hosts for upcoming NN14, the Motor City Kossacks are ready for their first meeting with the NN14 staff this January 9th. peregrine kate expressed the need to hear from as many politically radical, grass-roots organizers in Detroit during NN14 as possible and coalesce all this collective energy. All who attend this early meeting will get to shape the agenda. Please kosmail peregrine kate to attend this important event.
Here's one photo:
L-R: Four Motor City Kossacks: Amber6541, Brainwrap, sydneyluv, BFSkinner
You can still recommend peregrine kate's diary and see many MORE photos! Enjoy! You can join Motor City Kossacks by sending a Kosmail to peregrine kate.
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:: Events Currently on the Books for Kossacks ::
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Saturday, January 11th
Houston Kossacks Meet-up
TIME: 1:00 PM
LOCATION: Barry's Pizza
6003 Richmond Avenue • Houston
ORGANIZER: Send Chrislove a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. Chrislove
2. nomandates
3. Bree Davis
4. cosette
5. mister mustardhead
6. TDDVandy
7. Mary
8. Alan
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Maybees:
Mr. cosette
Libby Shaw
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Latest diary: [Waiting for linked diary]
Sunday, January 12th
NYC Kossacks Meet-up
TIME: Noon
LOCATION: Spitzer's Corner
101 Rivington Street (Ludlow) • NYC
Meet in the back room. This venue is wheelchair accessible.
ORGANIZER: Send sidnora a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. sidnora
2. blue jersey mom
3. rubyr
4. kathny
5. joanbrooker
6. oxfdblue
7. mattc129
8. Bethesda1921
9. No Exit
10. thankgodforairamerica
11. ericlewis0
12. Mets102
13. plf515
14. MBNYC
15. Design the Future
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Maybees:
mconvente
Ian Reifowitz
gchaucer2
Laura Clawson
Rosalie907
andgarden
wader
isabelle hayes
Dave G
jonnym
Batya the Toon
Its the Supreme Court Stupid
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Latest diary: Coming In From The Cold: January 12, A NYC Meetup! Reminder
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Saturday, January 25th
Tennessee Three Star Kossacks & Nashville KosKats Meet-up
TIME: TBA
LOCATION: TBA (Please send suggestions to marykk)
[Address] • Nashville
ORGANIZER: Send marykk a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. marykk
2. Sandy on Signal (Guest of Honor)
3. Land of Enchantment
4. jnhobbs
5. ZenTrainer
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Maybees: |
Latest diary: [Waiting for linked diary]
Saturday, January 25th
Asheville Kossacks Meet-up
SPEAKERS:
Asheville City Councilman Gordon Smith
Sarah Zambon from the League of Women Voters.
TIME: 1:00 PM
LOCATION: The Cantina
10 Biltmore Plaza • Asheville
ORGANIZER: Send randallt a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. davehouck
2. LamontCranston
3. randallt
4. joieau
5. Gordon20024
6. flwrightman
7. Otteray Scribe
8. emmasnacker
9. GordonNC (UID 5123 & City Councilman) GUEST SPEAKER!
10. cultjake
11. DawnN
12. Captain Sham
13. Mrs Sham
14. SteelerGrrl
15. SteelerGuy
16. Alecia
17. Mr. Alecia
18. Nic Goodman
19. Sarah Zambon (League of Women Voters) GUEST SPEAKER!
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Maybees:
Munchkn
One Pissed Off Liberal
people power granny
Burns Lass
Aviator Doc
stellaluna
eternallyvigilant |
Latest diary: DKos Asheville Update-Guest speakers!
Sunday, January 26th
SFKossacks Welcome matching mole to San Francisco!
TIME: TBD, daytime car trip to the Delta for birding with lineatus
LOCATION: Grizzly Island Wildlife Area
2548 Grizzly Island Road • Suisun City
lineatus will have a spotting scope and a few spare pairs of binoculars, so novices can have something to use.
ORGANIZER: Send lineatus a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. lineatus
2. matching mole
3. navajo
4. tgypsy
5. kimoconnor
6. Kestral
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Maybees: |
TIME: TBD, evening event for city folk and to celebrate dharmasyd's and kimoconnor's birthdays!
LOCATION: TBD
[Address] • [City]
ORGANIZER: Send lineatus a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. lineatus
2. matching mole
3. navajo
4. dharmasyd
5. side pocket
6. norm
7. kimoconnor
8. Glen The Plumber
9. remembrance
10. TLO
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Maybees: |
Latest diary: Dawn Chorus: Preview of Coming Attractions
Tuesday, January 28th
Silicon Valley Kossacks SOTU Watch Party
TIME: TBA
LOCATION: Lusty's Home
Address given privately to RSVPs • Silicon Valley
ORGANIZER: Send Lusty a kosmail to attend.
RSVPs:
1. Lusty
2. Glen the Plumber
3. remembrance
4. TLO
5. navajo
6.
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Maybees: |
Send
navajo a kosmail if you post a diary about an event so we can update our round-up.
Okay. Floor's open.
Tell us what you are doing on this NEW DAY?
