January 16th was not a good day.
It would have been my father's 90th birthday, and as usual, the date dredged up a lot of things I'd really rather not remember, so my morning didn't begin well.
It didn't end well, either.
Unable to load Daily Kos properly, I clicked over to The Political Carnival, another lefty politics site. And learned that one of the site's cofounders and cobloggers, Paddy Kraska, had walked on a few hours earlier.
I didn't know Paddy well. I "met" her in the comment threads at Balloon Juice, another site where I lurk a lot and comment occasionally, particularly when I can't load Daily Kos. But I was passingly familiar with her blog home, and with her and her coblogger, GottaLaff (a/k/a Laffy), whose name I know will be familiar to many Kossacks.
But I knew enough to know this: She was funny. She was fierce. She was committed, dedicated, a liberal's liberal who, no matter her own personal crises, never gave up and never gave in. From everything I ever saw, she always had a kind word and a virtual smile for everybody, a desire to help those who needed it, a passion for leftist politics and sound policy, a deep love for animals.
She was a Kossack.
She hadn't diaried much here lately. Her last diary was roughly a year and a half ago, in late June of 2012. But she'd been a Kossack since August 1, 2005, and she'd established a solid body of work here, writing a total of 117 diaries while co-administering TPC and commenting elsewhere, as well as maintaining a presence on Twitter and recording podcasts.
Her last comment here was less than two weeks before her death: a quick "Love ya, SR" to Trix in his Silly Rabbit guise late on the first Saturday night of the new year.
So why is this a "Community Fundraisers" diary, and not an "In Memoriam" one?
Simple.
Paddy, who walked on at the age of 52 (she would have been 53 on January 29th), was battling serious health problems, and, like many of us, serious financial obstacles. I have no doubt that much — probably all — can ultimately be laid at the feet of the Bush economy and the worthless politics of Congressional Republicans and their state counterparts. She, like too many of us, suffered very real (and ultimately very deadly) consequences from their actions. And now her family, in dire financial straits, is struggling just to maintain, much less pay all the expenses associated with a loved one's untimely death.
Late last year, Paddy did something wonderful for us. Each year, during the holidays, it was her custom to compile a "giving guide" of sorts that she posted every night at TPC. It included charitable organizations, like her own beloved local Humane Society. It included more ad hoc efforts, too, and I was shocked and honored to learn that in 2012, she'd posted a link to my diary here launching that winter's annual Propane Project drive for the Rosebud Reservation. And it included small businesses run by various bloggers. Last fall, she posted a note in the comments at Balloon Juice soliciting small businesses and favorite charities, and I asked her whether she'd be willing to include our gallery under the small business section.
She did, and she said some incredibly nice things about the gallery along the way. She also brought us a ton of Web site traffic.
She was going to promote the Propane Project again, but as folks here know, we took a hiatus this year. She would have included Okiciyap, but with my connection issues, I dropped the ball.
We had a few e-mail exchanges, and she mentioned at one point that her computer room was freezing — 22 degrees outside, an ungodly wind chill, and only a little space heater for heat. I asked her if she needed a hand with the heat. She didn't answer me about that particular issue, and so I thought either maybe it was just that one room had a non-working register or something, or that she was just politely letting me know that she was okay and didn't need (or at least didn't want) anything.
After she was gone, I found out that they were trying to survive a frigid Indiana winter with no central heat at all — just three little space heaters to heat the entire house. And that their pipes had burst some time back, and that she spent months unable to take a hot shower; to take a warm bath, she had to heat water on the stove and pour it into the tub.
I know a little something about what that's like.
And now I wish I had pushed her. But . . . people also have to be afforded the dignity and respect they want, and I didn't feel that pushing was something I was entitled to do. And it might not have made the slightest difference — or worse, somehow turned into a net negative. Stress can do that. Having people know what your situation is really like can sometimes be a terrible thing.
I know a little something about that, too.
At any rate, if you'd like to more about just what Paddy faced, not just in practical terms but on the health front, and overcame on a daily basis, you should read a few things. The announcement of her death, by Laffy, at TPC. Laffy's subsequent post, which includes more detail and a wealth of reminiscences about her friend and partner in politics. And coblogger and TPC Webmaster Lucian Dixon's official memorial post, with details of arrangements and a darling photo of a grade-school-aged Paddy, complete with the kind of bangs I remember having myself in second grade. Mine were much darker, but my mother got to them with her shears, with predictable results.
Then, if you have a connection that's better than mine, go to this link and listen to this podcast. In the words of Lucian, who forwarded the link to me:
[It] is an interview Laffy and Cliff Schecter did with Nicole Sandler - it's a podcast/webcast which tells how TPC was founded and how hard life was for Paddy yet she kept 'soldiering on' Paddy was on Nicole Sandler once - last summer - and
people can hear her voice.
Then, if you can, please kick in a few bucks to help Paddy's grieving family. Her desired arrangements are modest in the extreme: cremation, with a small memorial reception at the funeral home in Mishawaka, Indiana, this Saturday. But the funeral home's bill alone is $2,600, and that's money they don't have right now. There are also many other incidental expenses, as anyone who's ever been in this situation knows, and they've already had to pay out of pocket for many of them, as I understand it.
I'm setting the goal at $2,600, in hopes that we can take care of the funeral home's bill, at a minimum. Anything over and above that will go to help cover incidentals, including all the many things that will arise in the next few weeks but that the family's too shellshocked even to think of right now.
Lucian has spoken with Paddy's family, and has agreed to handle collection arrangements on their behalf. In Lucian's own words:
If you would like to do this, please send whatever you can to me, Lucian Dixon (webmaster for The Political Carnival) at lwdgrfx [at] gmail [dot] com. Please be sure to mark the donation simply as 'Paddy' or 'Donations for Paddy' so that I know where they're from.
If you'd prefer to send a check, please send it to me at 819 Oakwood St., #11, Jackson, MS 39202. If you'd like for me to call you, please send me an email with your number and I will get back to you.
You do not need to be signed up with PayPal in order to donate.
I asked a family member if Paddy had a favorite charity friends could donate to if they preferred that to sending money to defray her funeral expenses and was told people could donate to the Humane Society in her name. This is the website of the Humane Society in Indiana where she lived: http://www.humanesocietystjc.org/.
Lucian and I have been corresponding today, so I'm in touch with him; he'll try to get us periodic running totals this evening. Wings and I sent our donation a few days ago. It wasn't much; $50. But if we could get 52 people to match our donation, that would take care of the funeral home's bill.
I know it's January. I know times are tough; we're all hurting. But can you maybe forego one cup of coffee from Starbucks, one lunch out, one movie, one beer? It could make a real difference to a family that's in tremendous pain right now.
And it's exactly the sort of thing Paddy would do for any of us.
Chi miigwech.
