Now that the United States is nearing the point of one mass shooting incident per day and there are more than enough firearms to give every single person in the country a gun, let’s look a little deeper into the gun lobby’s bumper sticker solutions. Better yet, let’s apply NRA-style solutions to everything!
If we don’t need laws since only law-abiding people obey them, why do we need laws at all? Gasp, it’s true, laws will only be abided by the law-abiding. Ah, language can be such fun when you are arguing with the irrational gun-peddlers of the NRA. This would of course all be much more fun if people weren’t dying on a regular basis in our nation awash in bigger and badder weapons.
But our Founding Fathers! They were so absolute about guns that they wrote the clear-as-mud Second Amendment. Never mind the fact that both Thomas Jefferson and James Madison were part of the crew who banned guns on the campus of the University of Virginia. Those two must not have truly understood the originalist meaning of the very amendment they were involved in writing, poor misguided Fathers. Enjoy the cartoon, and stay safe!
[perky, fast-talking newsreel guy]
Welcome to Gun Logic, where everything makes sense all of the time because it just does!
Gun Logic is now spreading to other parts of society with impressive results!
Laws governing everything from traffic to banking to murder are stripped away . . .
Because, after all, if murder is outlawed, only outlaws will murder.
Similarly, only law-abiding citizens obey laws about fraud, racketeering and cruelty, so clearly we don’t need those freedom-killing laws either.
In fact, numerous studies prove that only law-abiding citizens abide by laws, so why do we even need the tyrannical oppression of laws anyway?
Freedom!
Gun Logic dictates that the Second Amendment refers to “arms” not “guns,” therefore nuclear arms are indeed protected by our Founding Fathers.
And if, in the unlikely event a dark and twisted individual uses nuclear arms for evil, the answer is to . . . solve all of the nation’s mental health problems, not infringe on the rights of law-abiding nuclear arms enthusiasts.
Remember, law-abiding people don’t need laws!
And if it works on a bumper sticker, it’s a great way to run the country!
Gun Logic— it just makes sense!
And now that there are no laws, tyrannical or otherwise, you must buy more guns to protect yourself from . . . this, lawlessness.
