I've been on this site for a long time. I hope I have given through my Diaries and comments as much has been given back to me, which is a lot.
I am asking for some help!!!
I am a drunk and alcoholic. I've known this for like 20 years. I've gone to rehab and AA.
Never took for any number of reasons.
I think the top of the list, I recall being in AA meetings hearing these horror stories of hitting rock bottom.
I listened but I have a huge house. No debit. Good job working for myself. Healthcare. I eat. Most days I walk about ten miles. Fit. I recall saying to myself if I am bluntly honest I am better and/or not these people.
Just talked to a former best friend that said to me (sober ten years) "yeah, I was that guy too."
Told him I was thinking of going to these AA meetings in the town I am staying in. None in my town. I can't drive to them, 2 DUIs. That fire in my house (not drinking related I might add -- one good thing).
Said I was worried it would get back to my family if I attended. He is like do you think your parents don't know you are a drunk?
If there is anybody that would like to reach out to me via Kos Mail or in the comments and offer some help. Wisdom. A person to talk to moving forward. A voice on a phone. I would appreciate it.
My friend said to me in ending he asked for help when his world started to “get small.” Mine is pretty small at this point. I don’t want it to get any smaller.