I certainly didn’t watch Trump’s speech last night, didn’t watch one second of the RNC convention. I’m of an age where self care is a big deal, so, I was caring for myself by ignoring the convention and watching Netflix.
But in passing I saw this picture of part of the family posing after, I assume, Trump’s speech.
My eye was first inexorably drawn to the hideous pleated neon green thing that Melania wore, with what appears to be a red belt. Why, just why? It just doesn’t comport with her usual aging sugar baby fashion, as far as I can tell, but maybe she’s seeing the end of her marriage coming into view and thought, fuck it.
Then I saw Barron and his thousand-yard stare, looking as if he would rather be anywhere else than next to these people. I have dealt with a 14/15 year old son. I know boys this age can be ornery and/or bored, particularly at functions that require them to wear a tie. But I am so grateful I have never in his 28 years seen Barron’s expressions on my son’s face.
Tiffany. Enough said. After I saw an picture Ivanka’s off-the-shoulder black cocktail dress, you just knew Tiffany (I refuse to call her Poor Tiffany, she knows what’s up) would show up in something similar.
But the center of this family tableau was, well, you know. The patriarch of this whole dysfunctional clan, shoveling on more makeup than his daughters, wife, daughter-in-law (was she there? Don’t care) and Kimberly Guilfoyle (is it Kimberly or Kimberley? Don't care) wore combined. Looking like a greasy melting candle.
And he’s looking down at some child...I assume it’s a grandson. One of Ivanka’s or Junior’s children (I don’t fucking care) who has been trotted out to show that Joe Biden isn’t the only one with a big extended family! Stop it! Trump has lots of kids, lots of grandkids, and, see, they all love him! They’re all here!
So this poor kid (he’s still young enough to be called Poor Kid) looks up at this Mr. Trump in expectation of...something. Some warmth from Mr. Trump. The hopefulness of youth. He thinks, but doesn’t really expect, that maybe Mr. Trump will envelope him in a hug, at least, (a kiss, no way) or smile at him. Or something.
But Poor Kid gets the same tiny-fisted thumbs up that the rest of the universe gets….minus the smile that Putin or Jerry Falwell Jr. gets.
Not even a tremendous thumbs up. Not a strong thumbs up. A half assed you can’t do anything for me, kid, so..whatever.
