There are an Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps and Coast Guard’s worth of pissed off chickens coming home to roost right now. And they are all shitting on Chickenshit-in-Chief Donald “the J is for Asshole” tRump. We don’t yet know what kind of legs this new information about an old scandal has. We do know that the chicken legged pretender on Pennsylvania Avenue is counting on his cult of denier bots to prop up his flagging approval.
Donald has the spokesweasel brigade out touting his “well known support for the military.” The military isn’t buying it, as Joe Biden is currently leading tRump in that group of voters.
Donald will soon begin trying to rewrite history and claim credit for winning battles he had nothing to do with. It’s what he does.
We thought we’d take a look at some battles that actually involved Space Cadet “Spanky” McBonespurs.
- The Battle of the Bulging Gut — tRump lost this long ago. He’ll try to claim victory anyway.
- Pork Chop Swill — Michelin gave the verdict on the food available in his hotel properties — no stars. His “perfect chocolate cake” was catered.
- Antiemaryanne — It’s hard to deny the tapes, but he’s trying.
- The Battle of West Point Ramp — We have the video of this rout.
- The Battle of Cheatinnookie — Another lost tRump battle. He had to pay a lot for this loss.
- Bullshit Run — This has been a continuous fight. We won’t see the end of this until November (or a stroke)
- The Battle of White Only Swamp — This one is going on right now. The tRump forces are retreating, but the outcome won’t become clear until the Redhats are forced back under their rocks.
- The Battle of LietoMe Gulf — There is a huge gulf between what the cultist are willing to swallow and what the rest of us have already rejected as a mountain of unpalatable malarkey.
- Pettysburg — tRump actually won this one. By unanimous acclamation, he is the most petty person ever to hold our highest office.
- Little Biglyhand — He lost this the moment he was referred to as a “short-fingered vulgarian.”
- The Battle of Fredtrumpswill — Another of Donnies rate victories. He managed to grab most of his daddy’s money, bilking his relatives.
- The Battle of Chickamauler — He will end up losing this one as soon as he longer has the power of the presidency to hide behind.
- The Battle of No Hope Church — He succeeded in crossing Lafayette Square but has been retreating ever since.
- The Charge up Dumb Don Hill — He thinks of himself as a rough rider (just ask Stormy), but he fell of his pony before it got out of the paddock (just ask Stormy).
- Bluster’s Last Stand — Calling everyone who asks a difficult question “nasty” can only carry him so far. It’s been crushed under the weight of his mendacity.
- The Battle of Crooked Billing — He’s facing a lot of Generals on this one. Tish James has him by the short and curlies. I don’t think she’ll let him escape.
- The Battle of New Lynchburg — He’s calling for this almost daily now. The antifascist crowd is growing, so his prospects of pulling this off are not in his favor.
- The Battle of Fart Pillow — No matter how much he tries to hide it, he smells of decay.
- The Battle of Bare Bottom Church — He has managed to keep his worship at this church from the conscious minds of his Prosperity Christian brigade. He is in danger of an open revolt in the ranks if the details become fully public.
- The Battle of Mountebank Casinos — He lost all three iterations of this battle.
- The Battle of Normality Breach — He’s gotten away with it so far, but the battle isn’t over yet.
- The Battle of the Chancellorismyhero — Also know as the bromance of Adolf & Don.
- The Battle of Quidbec Pro Quo — The final chapter of this war has yet to be written. tRump’s senior lickspittles saved him from an immediate defeat.
- The Battle of Bellow Would — How many bellows would a dumb cluck bellow if a dumb cluck could control himself?
- The Battle of Bilker Hill — He’s lost several Bilker Hill battles. He’s on pace to lose several more — bank fraud, securities fraud, wire fraud ...
- The Battles of Deep Bottom and Droop Mountain — Two actual battles that tRump must have had something to do with. They were already named after him.
Bonus points if you can name the actual battles and wars/conflicts that were belittled for this story.
Note: Stephanie Winston Wolkoff keeps putting me to sleep, I hope to finish soon.
Up the Resistance!
Music for Resisting
Memaliciousness
Ad(s) of the Day
A Blast from the Past (Do You Remember This Scandal?)
Evening Shade appears every evening at 7:30PM Eastern (unless I get lazy).
Cut and Paste Department. This is the regularly scheduled plea for readers. I’ve still only had to make two memes. You have it within your power to make me work. If you spread the word about Evening Shade and your spreadee announces themselves in the comments, you will become eligible to receive your very, very special noprize of a meme of your very own. All you have to do is jump up and get out there and start carnival barking, cajoling, proselytizing (or pimping, if you are of an irreligious bent). You could even pester and push. Procrastination is not an option — it’s a way of life.
chloris creator produced another fine roundup for our reading pleasure: Good News Roundup for Friday, September 4, 2020: We All Need to Work as Hard as We Can
Goodie followed Joe to Wisconsin: Biden showed empathy, humility, and wisdom in Kenosha: Day 54 out of 100 Days of Loving Joe Biden
Looks like Yosef 52 and I were on the same page today. He’s given us another topical scandal summary, ripped from the headlines: Trump and the Military, Part One
Yosef 52 keeps giving us the most sharable information on DailyKos: GET OUT THE VOTE. Do It For the "Losers and Suckers”
