Here’s a poem dedicated to...guess who! Isn’t everything about he-who-must-be-named Imperial-Dictator? I-Dic for short!
This poem is so very Trumpian because it’s erratic with no structured plan. And besides, what’s so great about iambic pentameter anyway?
So please forgive this terrible poem, but I was inspired by John Lithgow’s poems in his “Trumpty Dumpty” book series. His poetry is so on-point, and he took his time and created marvelous and standardized verse. This poem ain’t that!
But it made me feel better to get creative and throw out (if not “up”) some of Trump’s most outrageous and/or criminal behaviors of his wanna-be dictatorship. It’s like a little trip down the memory lane of “what travesties and violations of the Constitution and social norms has he thought up now?!” Sadly, there’s so many horrible acts he’s committed that I didn’t have time to include them all. So please feel free to create your own adverse verses.
Better yet, copy this poem and add to the end your own verse of what’s outraged you, then email it along to your favorite terrible-poet friends for their free-form creativity, and tell them to pass it along to their Trump-loving friends. Who knows: it might change a mind or two!
But do it quickly to get it out there before the election! If you wait until after next Tuesday and somehow Trump gets re-elected (by cheating), we’ll all wind up in concentration camps...sorry, I meant metal, 6 ft. x 6 ft. mini-condos complete with security bars and an aluminum blanket! Ah, well, here’s to minimalism.
Trump's Poetic, Pathetic Soliloquy: A Terrible Poem for a Terrible Time and a Terrible Person
I am Trump, this is MY country
Now it is time to bow to me
The World is no longer our fan
But that is part of Putin’s plan
Putin is my buddy, Kim I love so well
American Intelligence can go to hell
My Qanon believers are such gullible chumps
Those foreign Q-creators think they’re Forrest Gumps
Joe Biden’s smart, he’s nobody’s fool
I said he was senile cause I’m a tool!
I’ll blame Hunter Biden and put Joe in a bind
Too bad my scam was busted
My crooks cannot be trusted!
Cause the email reader was legally blind
Damn that Joe’s character
Hope Joe's down for the count
Damn my taxes coming out
And my hidden Chinese bank account
If I win this race for the 2020’s
I’ll fire all the good guys, they’re my enemies
That Fauci doc, gonna show him the door
Cause so many believe and love him more
Christopher Wray
Has had his day
He must go away
Cause he won’t play
…… my way!
Howard Stern says I hate my base
I don’t want them near my orange face
Those dumb generals pray that we survive this mess
If this democracy survives is anybody’s guess
Gen. Mattis goes to church to pray to his Pop
But I stand out front for a Bible photo op
MY country guarded by those suckers and losers
Wouldn’t that also apply to cops in cruisers?
I’m a war prez so I attack, tack, tack
And if you tell the truth I’ll sack, sack, sack
All should bow to me on bended knees
But leave behind those unsightly amputees
I make fun of the disabled and of people’s faces
If you could only hear what I think of the non-white races
Can you trust me if there’s a major war?
Sure, the nuclear football’s with me in the golfing car.
Democracy still here, ugh, job is getting tough
Golfing three times more than Bama
(and I cheat in the rough)
Millions hungry, their jobs closed down
No more money says Me and Senate
(we’re goin’ out of town)
Blaming chaos on Dems and Biden; actually done on my watch
Too bad I can’t blame them for grabbing that woman’s crotch
I’ll have unprotected sex with a porn star
Then go home to wife and baby, now that’s Par!
Too much stress, golf two times a week
What promise not to golf if I win Prezidential preak?!
Tax cuts mostly for my friends the rich
Everyone else can just squeal and bitch
The guy who wrote my autobio, feel my wrath
So stop telling everybody that I’m a sociopath
Cohen, Manafort, Gates, Flynn, Papadapoulos, Stone, Bannon
Just some of my guys who’ve committed crimes, want a pardon?
Back to golf to charge up bills at Mar-a-Lago, you suckers
You didn’t see me coming, with my family of hucksters
I’m such a philanthropist a foundation I created
To rip off donors for a $10k me-portrait generated
My biznesses I've run into the ground
Now our country itself ain't so sound
The kids’ White House jobs create opportunism
I say to hell with those laws on nepotism
While working the trade deal in Chhhhiiiiinaaa.
Got 34 China trademarks for me and Ivankaaaa
Jared, Junior, and Eric…… eh, not worth a verse
Feb. 7: Deadly stuff: I knew Covid more deadly than flu
March 19: Plenty of young people at risk, knew that, too
Aug. 5: “Children are almost immune,” I said.
Sept. 16: Babies and tykes are also dead
My herd immunity game plan is such good med
It only needs 290 million infected and 3 mil dead
In 2015 I promised not to stop Medicare and SS
I’ve already started defunding them, so what!, I confess
Gonna give you insurance , pre-existing conditions?!!?
I don’t have a plan yet so why don’t you petition?
China right now is building two of my luxury retreats
Even tho I said I wouldn’t do biz in the Prezidential seat
Gotta keep repeating “Lock them up!”
Cause I refuse to leave this White House dump
Got DeJoy dollars, slowing down that mail
If those voters vote, I could go to jail
Poet’s Question:
“But what about thousands and thousands of Covid dead?
And those Russian bounties on our soldier’s heads?”
You want me to tell you the truth about Covid and the dead?
When have you ever been able to believe a word I said?