This is an essay of sorts that I wrote a couple of weeks ago, closer to the election, but it still describes much of how I feel.
My father sent me a graphic the other day of what North America would look like if the blue states were to merge with Canada. It was meant to be humorous - a bit of a laugh to cheer me out of the bitterness and dread I have been unable to stem since the election. But it has instead crystalized the source of my sudden disillusionment with out current state of affairs. I no longer believe that we truly are one nation.
I am thoroughly and in all ways a Blue Stater. I am single, bisexual and fiercely independent. Though I have my own set of strong values, I have never participated in any organized religion. I disdain of the suburbs, have never lived in a rural area and would never choose to.
But these are all choices I made for myself. No one forced them on me and I would never want to force them on anyone else. They are right for my life and mine alone. My oldest and dearest friend, on the other hand, is a conservative Catholic who lives in South Carolina because those are the right choices for him.
Unfortunately what this election has conclusively proven for me is that while many individuals, such as my best friend and I, can bridge the gap between Red and Blue, our country and government can not. The divide is simply too fundamental, no pun intended. It is not merely a philosophical difference between people of faith and people of facts - it is a difference of everything. Of worldview, of upbringing, of goals, and yes of "values". I don't mean merely pro-gay marriage or not, pro-gun control or not. I mean that Blue Staters have an entirely different definition of the word than do Red Staters. It is also not merely a function of geography. There are die-hard Red Staters in California just as there are die-hard Blue Staters in Georgia.
I am 29 and while I wouldn't go so far as to say that this rift will not be healed in my lifetime, I do believe that this is a generational conflict. It is a seismic shift in our democracy that, along with the decline of civility, compromise and mutual respect, I worry we are no longer strong enough nor flexible enough to absorb without lasting damage.
All of which brings me to the current Administration and Congress. Yes, they have a majority. Yes, they control all three branches of government. But 48% of the country still disagrees, often passionately, with their policies. If they had shown the slightest recognition of that fact, I would not be nearly so disheartened as I am. It is not just that they don't understand who we are and what we want, it is that they don't even make the barest pretense of finding out. I often don't understand aspects of their lifestyle, but unless they're trying to harm me or those I care about, it's their right to live as they please. They don't seem to see it that way. They make me feel as if because I am unfamiliar to them, they want to outlaw everything about me.
When I was younger, my sister and I eventually chose to live apart from one another - if I was with my dad, she was with my mom and vice versa. Had we been forced to tough it out as teenagers, I believe our relationship would not have survived into adulthood. Sadly, this kind of custody arrangement is impossible at a national level except through true federalism, which is highly unrealistic given our current political system. But just as it was for my sister and me, a measure of separation must be provided in order to assure that a future relationship between Blue and Red is not only healthly but indeed possible.
