This is a seriously crazy person:
Please, you need to get this person help. I don't know what Fox News has for a health plan -- being conservative, I can only presume you have none -- but I'm sure Murdoch has a few bucks lying around. We all know about "showmanship", but there is "showmanship", and then there is "batshit crazy with a side of fries". There are "alternate points of view", and then there is "explosive decompression of the mind".
I know what you're thinking, Fox News. I know you're thinking "you know, I bet if we just give this guy a show, sooner or later he's just going to lose it, blow a gasket, blow a fuse, pop a tire, break the cookie jar, spread the mayonnaise, ratchet the clank, or whatever the kids are calling it these days. And that will be ratings gold."
But I got news for you. This gasket is already well and truly blown. That tire is already popped -- this guy makes Rush Limbaugh look as solemn and philosophic as one of the founding fathers. No, we're at the point of the movie where Thema and Louise and Glenn Beck have driven off that cliff, and the car is hanging in the air, and Beck is fiddling with the radio trying to find a program he likes before we all vicariously hit the ground with him. We're at the point of the show where Geraldo is peering into that vault, and there's Glenn Beck, dusty and vacant-eyed, staring back at him, and even Geraldo can figure out that this is about to be marked in the annals of television history, and not in a good way.
This is not Good Touch. This is Bad Touch. This is crazy person pornography. This is an entire show in which an animated courtroom doll shows where all the bad people touched him.
Please... think of the children. Is it right to teach our children that such crazy people actually exist? Shouldn't we sweep them under the rug, or put them in special institutions -- isn't that the American way? Don't we have programs to help people like this, so the rest of us don't have to worry about them?
Please, Fox News... please give Glenn "David Koresh Was a Pansy" Beck the help he needs. Oxycontin, diaper sex, drunk dialing their own producers, whatever it is that gets conservatives through the day -- please get him some of that.
For the children?
