megan helen

megan helen https://www.dailykos.com/user/megan helen/rss/index.xml News Community Action Copyright 2005 - Steal what you want Sun, 26 Jan 2020 13:07:28 +0000 Sun, 26 Jan 2020 13:07:28 +0000 Daily Kos rss@dailykos.com (Daily Kos) Daily Kos rss@dailykos.com (Daily Kos) Girl's first assault https://www.dailykos.com/story/2014/5/31/1303527/-Girl-s-first-assault (Trigger warning) This is one brief story. It is mine. uh-SAWLT —noun 1. a sudden, violent attack; onslaught: an assault on tradition. 2. Law. an unlawful physical attack upon another; an attempt or offer to do violence to another, with or without battery, as by holding a stone or club in a threatening manner. In April 2013 I went to Las Vegas for a weekend of fun and relaxation with a girlfriend. It was my first time in Vegas as an adult. My first time at a club. My first time dancing. No problem. I am a strong, confident woman. I've done some traveling, without incident, in places where women are advised not to go alone. And I'm not alone. We went to several dance clubs and had a great time. Met many friendly, non-threatening men. Most were respectful of our subtle indications of interest or non. There was nothing scary. No stalkers. No one trying to spike our drinks. It was getting late and we decided we were done for the evening. My girlfriend went to say goodbye to a new friend. And I was grabbed from behind. I'm in a large room crowded with people. And I'm certain that if some of the gentlemen around me had known what was going on... Would they have done something?  I don't know. Surrounded by people, I am effectively alone. Standing immediately behind me, he reached around me with both hands and grabbed my crotch. He gripped my very upper thighs and pulled out. I grabbed his hands and threw them off of me. He shrugged and walked away. My girlfriend and I left the club. I didn't report him. I just wanted out. To get someplace safe. In retrospect I should not have focused on his hands. I should have targeted his core with my elbow, assisted by an anchor from my other hand. I could have made a meaningful connection from the back of my head to his nose. I was wearing shoes that, if properly placed, would not have been comfortable. I should have yelled and drawn attention. I have taken fighting and self-defense classes. I know what I should have done. But I didn't do it. I was trained but not prepared. I don't think I really believed it would happen. I'm nearly 40. I'm not the typical mark, or so I thought. Since then I have taken more instruction in hand to hand combat including sparring with impact. I hope I'll never have to use it. PostScript: after writing this I realized there was another incident. When I was 22 there was some unfortunate scheduling that resulted in me being near Market street in SF alone at night. I've walked Budapest, Bratislava, other cities alone, at night. It's only at home that I've had real trouble. rss@dailykos.com (megan helen) Assault Men Misogyny Women yesallwomen _1303527 Sun, 01 Jun 2014 05:07:53 +0000 One woman in a taxi full of Men https://www.dailykos.com/story/2014/5/30/1302927/-One-woman-in-a-taxi-full-of-Men One small story.  Intended to be part of a larger dialogue on misogyny today. I was in Italy a couple of weeks ago. One morning I piled into a taxi with 3 male coworkers - 2 Americans and a well-traveled Brit. Usually the taxi drivers struggle with English or we good-naturedly attempt some conversation in Italian. This taxi driver had good English, was verbose and inspired by an imagined camaraderie with the Brit.  It started with a story on traveling to Singapore. Through some peculiar machinations his passport was taken from him. "They do that with girls too around 12 years old and don't give it back 'til they're 18.  Yeah, only $20 and you can have a girl." Allow me to back up for a moment. At this point it has been mere days since 276 schoolgirls were kidnapped in Nigeria. The leader of the terrorist organization allegedly responsible threatens to sell them "in the marketplace."  At this writing, these girls are still missing. My friendly taxi driver exhibits no awareness that his participation in the economic structure of $20 girls contributes to violence against women, underage or not. On the contrary, he seems giddy that such a marketplace is available for his pleasure. He shares the information as a fact: that's the way they do things in the East. And also as information sharing: could be useful next time any of us find ourselves in the area. My colleagues shift uncomfortably and maintain a firm silence. I'd say they are painfully aware that I am present. The taxi driver continues on a theme. Women Around the World!  I can't play nice. "How much is a girl in Michigan?", my voice dripping with unrepressed disgust and hate. He doesn't give a number but neither is he daunted. Why should he be?  Why should he be ashamed?  He ranks women by their nationality. I was not surprised to learn that Americans are not the most adventuresome. The ride is mercifully over. I do not have the obligation to interact with him for the tab. As we disembark, the Brit says "the sexual mores of Italians abroad!"  If I may paraphrase, in his view: that's the way they do things in Italy. As I simmer over this one man and how I feel about my colleagues inaction and what I could or should have said, I wonder, Where is the line?  What exactly is so offensive about his story?   I don't have a philosophical objection to prostitution. It's not a profession I highly respect but I don't think it is one that needs to carry shame. One's own body is an asset and it could be employed as readily as one's mind, if so chosen. An Asset must be:  (1) under your control  (2) as a result of a past event - let's say birth for this purpose  (3) a source of future (economic) benefit - health, time, performance, pleasure Underage individuals often don't meet parameter 1. Obviously so if their passport has been confiscated. So, if the underage girls had been omitted from the story, would I be ok with it? No, I think not. Girls (women) were objects in his adventures, existing only where their paths crossed his. It was his story after all. None of them were driving my taxi. rss@dailykos.com (megan helen) Men Misogyny Women yesallwomen _1302927 Fri, 30 May 2014 15:42:23 +0000