I am a 52 year old professional, educated woman. I was born, raised and live in Grand Rapids, Michigan. My position was "eliminated due to restructuring" in March, along with a few others in my department. The place where I worked (please don't ask me to name the organization, because I won't, and more precisely, I can't) restructures on a routine basis, and when you hire in, the term "at will" is presented, up front, as a real possibility. I understood that.
I've done my level best to handle this turn of events with grace and peace, and I haven't complained about being unemployed (okay, maybe a tiny bit, but really, not much). I've done everything I'm supposed to do to look for a new job, to move forward. I've done a lot of networking, rethinking my persona and how to sell myself, rebranding, taking loads of classes, trying to figure out what the next big thing in my life is going to be. I've concluded that, no matter what, I must love what I do and do what I love, and that happiness will follow. I've also come to the decision that I fit better within a small organization that allows me to be, well, me.
Let me back track. For the first time in my life, I found myself unemployed at 51 years old. I've worked since I was 12 (babysitting), and paid taxes into the system since I was 16. Worked all through college. Got a job in 1982 the week after I graduated with a B.S. in English and Communications. I had a couple of months off when I had my child in 1988, and when I had an accident in 1994. Beyond that, I've worked full time my entire life. I've paid taxes. Happily, actually. (I believe in supporting The Commons, and I wish the tax rates were higher.)
And then I found myself in what I call the "Tom Petty state." I was "Free Falling." (I am a good girl, and I'm crazy about Elvis [Costello]! I love Buddha, and America, too.) And so it goes.
If you'll join me below the pretty pumpkin serif, I'll explain why my heart is heavy tonight.
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