Now, let's assume for a second the Republicans even know how to count votes correctly. The results in Iowa, Maine, and elsewhere this cycle might indicate otherwise, but let's not even go there.
Did you hear the big news today? That's right - I know you were waiting with baited breath to hear the results from the primary caucus in the Northern Mariana Islands, and now they're in! The Northern Marianas territory, or some random collection of people claiming to represent the Republican party there, has gone big for Mitt:
SAIPAN, Northern Mariana Islands -- Another victory for presidential hopeful Mitt Romney. He's won the Republican caucus in the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands, picking up nine delegates from the U.S. territory.
Romney won 87 percent of the 848 votes cast Saturday on the main islands of Saipan, Tinian and Rota.
And in Guam, they don't even bother with you know, balloting and other such nonsense. The theoretically somehow representative primary caucus state convention votes by show of hands, and in true Soviet fashion, everyone agrees!
207 of the 215 Guam GOP party members eligible to vote turned out for the convention at the Sheraton Laguna Resort in Tamuning for the Republican State Convention and Presidential Caucus.
Following remarks by Romney's son Matt who arrived on Guam Friday night, Lt. Governor Ray Tenorio presented a motion to waive the traditional secret ballot.
"I'm obviously thrilled that it's a unanimous decision," Matt Romney said.
OK, Guam and the Northern Marianas territories each were allocated 9 delegates to the GOP national convention. The territories, that have zero electoral votes and no ability to run an election, have together awarded 18 delegates to the convention. By comparison, a small territory called the State of New York is to award 95 delegates, and probably will NOT do so by show of hands (I think).
New York, for those of you that don't know, has nearly 20 million people living there, and is one of the original 13 states. Guam, I'm sure no one knows, has 150,000 citizens, while the Northern Mariana Islands, which 95% of Americans don't even recognize as American, has about half that. So these two territories, that don't know how to print secret ballots, between them control more than 20% of the delegate total allocated to New York, despite having about 1% of the population.
Now call me crazy ("you're crazy!"), but doesn't this at all seem like an opportunity for the establishment to control the allocation of delegates, by giving them to places where no one lives and no one pays attention to what goes on? For that matter, isn't it striking that the self-styled "Leader of the Free World" is selected in a process that first limits the serious competition to two political parties, and then sets up byzantine, ridiculously undemocratic and mal-apportioned processes to select the nominees for that contest?
Is it just me, or is there just a bit more pageantry to the good ol' days of backroom selection of presidential nominees? The Good Ol' Boys have given a little ground to the voters, but they have more control over the money than ever before (thanks to Citizens United) and they set up bizarre undemocratic rules with all kinds of safeguards against a result they don't like.
Or am I crazy?
