How magnificent is our world
Let me jump into the religion discussion. It is a bit long, but I am attempting to demonstrate how religion shaped my life. I based my values on the Catholic values l learned in school. They served me well and enriched my life.
I was born in Indiana to a Catholic family in 1951. I graduated 8th Grade in 1965 from a Catholic School and 1969 from a public High School. My grade school was 1st through 8th grade with two classes of each grade. Out of the 16 classrooms 13 were staffed with Sisters. We changed teachers during the day, not classrooms. We attended Daily Mass, had devotions for Rogation Days, Lent and Advent, throats were blessed, ashes were smudged and pets were blessed. As a school we prayed a decade of the Rosary at the end of recess in the months of May and October to honor the Blessed Mother. We had days off from school for the name’s day of the Pastor, the Patron Saint of the Sisters and Holy Days of Obligation off from school. We marched 2 X 2 to and from the bathrooms and in and out of the school. Silence was kept in the halls and the bathrooms (the terror of a 7th grader when Sister rapped on the bathroom door (Sisters never knocked, they rapped) threatening to come in see who was talking. When we misbehaved we were threatened with expulsion from school and sent to public school “where they had to take us”. It was a fate, I did not risk. In fact, I think I have white lung disease from clapping blackboard erasures after school.
On the up side, things were changing. The Mass started to have dialogue mass where the Priest said: Dominus vobiscum and we responded Et cum spiritu tuo. The communion fast was shortened from Midnight to three hours before reception, then Mass was in English. Kennedy was elected president and the was joy and optimism as the world was changing was in the air. Our Polish Sisters from Chicago started a Hospital for Blacks in Mississippi as Blacks were not treated in white hospitals. This did not change until Medicare required treatment for all people with/out insurance for a facility to receive Medicare funds. The Sisters told us about the plight of the Migrant Workers in Kansas where Sisters worked in the Summer, suggesting we learn Spanish as it will be the second language in America in our lifetimes. Then Vatican II came and the rest is history. That is until JPII became pope and he slowly turned the clock back.
In the political world things were changing big time: Civil Rights Legislation, Medicare/Medicaid, women were finding their voice and the summer of 1969 saw the LGBT movement start at Stonewall. We had gone to the moon, life was getting better for many Americans. There was optimism that, we the people, could end the Vietnam war.
I bought the whole Catholic ball of wax. I based my life on the teachings I learned from the Sisters. Joy in faith, service to the poor, the Corporal Works of Mercy. I stated tutoring at a Black public grade school as a sophomore in HS. I have been volunteering off and on ever since. This was before mandatory school integration. I even took swimming lessons as a young child in a segregated pool. This pool is now a Civil Rights Heritage Center.
Career time came and I wanted to be a teacher. But the Vietnam war was roaring along and teachers received a deferment and so teachers were a dime a dozen. What to do?
My 7th grade teacher was a very young Sister very joyful and faith-filled (she is still a nun today) and instilled a “Love of Learning and a desire for God”, (a book title from Monastic Studies). I remained friends with her as I went on to college. She suggested I be a nurse. I retired after 45 years of nursing. It was perfect for me as it was a way I could “give a cup of cool water in HIs name” and no one would know my religious motives. I remained a bedside nurse as I just wanted to take care of folks. Critical Care nursing allowed me to use my compassion with science to help people get better or comfort them and families if a patient died.
I even spent 15 years as a Religious. But the community moved farther and farther right. Many of the others were racist, thought they were so much better than others as they lived off of the donations of others. Many of these men never held a paying job in their lives. The spent their time watching others to make sure others followed the rules, but exempted themselves. (sound familiar?) I could not support those attitudes and left. I lived as a Catholic lay man for years serving in a variety of ministries.
At the age of 60, I left religion behind, suddenly (like I was struck off my horse) it did not make any sense to me. I went through a period of great anger, but as I continue to wrestle with the existential questions regarding life, I became comfortable without religion in my life. I remain in awe of nature and science. Sister said science is a gift from god to help humanity grow and develop understanding about the world and nature. I do miss the sense of belonging to a larger community.
People tell me I am a good man. When I was retired in 2019, I was embarrassed on how many coworkers said they wish they were as good a nurse as I. The President of our Healthcare System took me out to lunch to thank me for all I did for the hospital, its patients and employees. But my life was based on the values I learned as a young Catholic: love of others and try to make the world a better place.
When I close this stage show called my life, if there is a god, I did the best I could to “love one another”. If there is nothing, I have lived a good life. Regardless of what is at the end, I am grateful for the life I have had. IMO, my Catholic values helped shape me and my life. For that I am grateful. Religion worked for me.
