Just burn the olive branches already. Republicans are getting the gang back together for one last hurrah—they may not succeed in stealing the election but they're sure as hell going to kneecap the incoming Biden administration.
The conspiracy cooked up by Donny Dons, Billy Boy Barr, and Mitchy Mitch has no basis in reality, but putting the country's national security and overall well-being on the line sure is fun. For starters, the General Services Administration plans to continue withholding a letter that would allow the Biden transition team critical access to government resources. COVID-positive White House chief of staff Mark Meadows was apparently feeling well enough to tell Politico that GSA chief Emily Murphy planned to continue her unprecedented denial of federally certifying the results of the election until at least Friday. A GSA spokesperson even compared the entire situation to the contested 2000 election, saying the agency would "abide by, and fulfill, all requirements under the law and adhere to prior precedent established by the Clinton Administration in 2000.”
As if Trump's loss was somehow dependent on the results of a single swing state rather than the handful of swing states where Biden has either already won or is maintaining his leads. But sure, in Donald Trump's fantasyland, it's just like 2000.
In the meantime, Attorney General Billy Boy and GOP Leader Mitchy Mitch put their heads together to go all in on Trump's delusions—anything to lift the spirits of the Dons. In the absence of even a single credible allegation of voter fraud, Barr went ahead and authorized federal prosecutors on Monday to investigate any "substantial allegations" of irregularities just in case. Who knows, Rudy G might still cook up a little something. Stay tuned for his next destination presser nestled somewhere between that fantasy sex shop and an outward-bound crematorium—either way, it's an otherworldly experience.
And back on the Senate floor, Mitchy Mitch held yet another ceremonial betrayal of oath, country, and the integrity that apparently escaped him at incarnation. "The president has every right to look into allegations and to request recounts under the law," McConnell explained Monday of Trump's imaginary voting "irregularities." The press, McConnell continued, doesn't "get veto power over the legal rights of any citizen, including the President of the United States." In other words, McConnell's totally on board with giving Trump, Billy Boy, and Rudy G the space to tilt at windmills, particularly since he needs Trump's frenzied supporters in Georgia in a lather over their imaginary disenfranchisement. The gamble? They'll rush back to the polls in a couple months after being told the election was stolen out from under them.
But the conspiracy ran into a little unforeseen snag back in Georgia. After the two GOP senators facing January runoffs accused Georgia’s Republican secretary of state of failing the state's residents and called for his resignation, he got a little huffy. First off, Sec. Brad Raffensperger said no resignation was in the offing. Second, Sens. Kelly Loefler and David Perdue might want to concentrate on actually winning the election rather than pointing fingers at others for why they didn't.
"As a Republican, I am concerned about Republicans keeping the U.S. Senate," Raffensperger said. "I recommend that Senators Loeffler and Perdue start focusing on that."
But outside of Raffensperger, Washington Republicans are giving Trump’s baseless voter fraud claims as much oxygen as possible while hobbling the transition of power to Joe Biden. It’s a national security nightmare but, hey, Republicans never give a damn about anyone or anything but themselves.