Take, Take, Take Two
Over the weekend I re-ran-into these terrific Ayn Rand reviews of children's movies as imagined by Mallory Ortberg a dozen years ago in The New Yorker. If you missed 'em the first time, bask in the greed…
“Charlotte’s Web”
A farmer allows sentimental drawings by a bug to prevail over economic necessity and refuses to value his prize pig, Wilbur, by processing and selling him on the open market. Presumably, the pig still dies eventually, only without profiting his owners. The farmer’s daughter, Fern, learns nothing except how to become an unsuccessful farmer. There is a rat in this movie. I quite liked the rat. He knew how to extract value from his environment. —Two stars.
“How the Grinch Stole Christmas”
Taxation is also a form of theft. In a truly free society, citizens should pay only as much as they are willing for the services they require. —Three stars.
Continued...
“Lady and the Tramp”
A ridiculous movie. What could a restaurant owner possibly have to gain by giving away a perfectly good meal to dogs, when he could sell it at a reasonable price to human beings? A dog cannot pay for spaghetti, and payment is the only honest way to express appreciation for value. —One star.
"Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory"
An excellent movie. The obviously unfit individuals are winnowed out through a series of entrepreneurial tests and, in the end, an enterprising young boy receives a factory. I believe more movies should be made about enterprising young boys who are given factories. —Three and a half stars. (Half a star off for the grandparents, who are sponging off the labor of Charlie and his mother. If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.)
Read the rest here. Assuming you find it in your self-interest to do so.
And now, our feature presentation...
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Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, December 28, 2022
Note: They say that "nothing beats a great pair of L'Eggs." But over the weekend I found something that does: cheese and crackers topped with hickory-smoked summer sausage. Who knew???
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til the full "wolf moon": 9:
Days 'til Ice Fest at the National Mississippi River Museum & Aquarium in Dubuque, Iowa: 17
Increase in the 2023 appropriations bill passed by Congress for the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Ending the HIV Epidemic in the United States initiative: $100 million
Percent by which the initiative aims to bring the number of new HIV infections down by 2030: 90%
Consecutive quarters that British household income has dropped, setting them up for "the worst period of living standards in memory": 4
Percent of its remaining goodwill Israel is currently squandering by lurching hard right and becoming just another international MAGA cesspool: 100%
Number of LPGA wins—making her the winningest golfer, male or female, in history—by Kathy Whitworth, who died Christmas Eve at 83: 88
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Mid-week Rapture Index: 186 (including 5 globalisms and the final word on Christmas). Soul Protection Factor 24 lotion is recommended if you’ll be walking amongst the heathen today.
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Puppy Pic of the Day: German Snowpherd…
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CHEERS to seeing the planet as half-full. Well, of you put aside for a moment the fact that we missed our chance to save ourselves a loooong time ago, it's worth noting that a handful of optimistic humans are earning their paychecks in the environmental sector. CBS News highlights a few of the good news stories of 2022:
» [T]he nonprofit Benioff Ocean Science Laboratory has launched buoys equipped with underwater microphones (or hydrophones) that listen for whale song, and alert nearby ships to slow down. And they seem to be working.
» Twenty years ago, clean sources (like solar and wind energy) provided about 8% of U.S. power. This year, they accounted for a record: more than 38%. And of all the new power capacity we built this year, 81% of it runs on renewable power. Another record!
» Amazon is phasing out its hundreds of millions of plastic shipping envelopes in favor of paper ones that can be recycled, or that biodegrade; and Colgate developed a fully recyclable toothpaste tube…and then gave away the formula to its competitors.
Polite golf clap to everyone who reused, repurposed, and/or recycled in 2022. Well, except for the politicians who did it with their talking points. Ha ha ha ha ha!!!
CHEERS to signs that suggest you've lost. You have to really suss out the subtleties of the developing situation in the governor's race in Arizona to see what's going on. It's kinda murky, a bit hazy, a tad opaque, if you will. But if you squint real hard, you can sorta get the gist of how the election may have turned out between Katie Hobbs and Kari Lake:
Democratic Gov.-elect Katie Hobbs and Maricopa County filed for sanctions Monday against Republican Kari Lake, less than 48 hours after a judge ruled against Lake's efforts to have herself declared the winner of Arizona's governor race.
Hobbs and the county asked for sanctions against Lake and her legal team after an Arizona judge denied Lake's bid to reverse the results of the November election in a two-day trial. Lake, a prominent election denier and Trump ally, was allowed to go to trial last week with two of her 10 claims, which alleged misconduct with ballot printers and problems with ballot chain of custody.
Maricopa County Superior Court Judge Peter Thompson denied Lake’s challenge after the trial in a 10-page ruling Saturday.
Just as I suspected. Still too close to call.
CHEERS to changing times. On today’s date in 1852, Emma Snodgrass was arrested in Boston for wearing pants. Today she'd be arrested for not wearing them. Discuss.
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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CHEERS to Texas. America's 28th State—sorry, I won’t call all y'alls a republic because your heads are big enough as it is—celebrates its 161st birthday today. Yeah, we remember the Alamo...and also that every governor elected by you since Ann Richards has been all hat and no cattle. (The current one is absolutely psycho.) On the other hand, you're the stomping grounds of Molly Ivins, LBJ, Jim Hightower, Beto O'Rourke, and them gol'durn Castro brothers, and even Dwight Eisenhower spent his first two years there, so points for that, as well as for continuing your ever-so-slow-but-steady march toward purple-state status. In the crock pot this evening: Armadillo stew. But not real armadillos. We only serve tofudillos.
JEERS to the last place fascism should be on the rise. Let’s see how the new ultra-right-wing freak show government is going over in Israel. My prediction: swimmingly. Let's take a peek…
Netanyahu is set to form the most ultranationalist and religious government in Israel’s history between his Likud movement and several openly anti-LGBTQ parties. This has raised fears among Israel’s LGBTQ community that the new government, expected to take office in the coming week, will roll back gains made for LGBTQ rights in Israel in recent years.
When I said swimmingly I mostly meant the drowning kind of swimmingly.
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16 years ago in C&J: December 28, 2006
WHATEVER to traditional-media condescension. TIME magazine's person of the year is YOU. I’m filing an appeal. It should've been me.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to great moments in chemistry. 111 years ago this week, in 1911, Marie Curie received her second Nobel Prize for her work on radioactive elements:
After Marie and Pierre Curie first discovered the radioactive elements polonium and radium, Marie continued to investigate their properties. In 1910 she successfully produced radium as a pure metal, which proved the new element's existence beyond a doubt. She also documented the properties of the radioactive elements and their compounds.
Radioactive compounds became important as sources of radiation in both scientific experiments and in the field of medicine, where they are used to treat tumors.
The Nobel committee honored Marie "in recognition of her services to the advancement of chemistry by the discovery of the elements radium and polonium, by the isolation of radium and the study of the nature and compounds of this remarkable element." You might say she got a glowing review.
Have a happy humpday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
I have no idea why “Elmo” is such a continued source of interest. Or Bill in Portland Maine.
—Digby
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