Let’s Update the DK Ukraine Relief Tote Board
It’s been awhile since we checked in on the fund set up by Daily Kos to help relief agencies in Ukraine. With the twin threats of winter weather and Russia’s continued attacks on civilian centers making life hell, the need for basic survival essentials is still critical—thus the reason why our humble site reached out to critical relief groups that provide food, medical care, housing, education, financial aid, and animal rescue efforts. As we approach the third Christmas since the invasion began, here’s the current status of your generosity...
$3,568,880.54
Not bad for a bunch of bloggers in their jammies, huh. If you'd like to add more support to the four chosen groups—the World Central Kitchen, AmeriCares, Razom for Ukraine, and the International Fund for Animal Welfare—click here and ActBlue will help you take care of the rest. Thanks for your ongoing support for Ukraine, which continues revealing Russia (and its MAGA stooges here in the States) for the incompetent, boozed-up sewer bully it is under Tsar Poopypants.
Cheers and Jeers for Tuesday, December 19, 2023
Note: The Bill in Portland Maine Kiddie Pool series of non-fungible tokens, of which zero were produced and sold for zero dollars, sold out over the weekend in zero seconds. We’re going to now take the money we didn’t make and not retire to Myrtle Beach. Thank you. —Mgt.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til the next full "cold moon": 7
Days 'til the New Year's Eve Walleye Drop in Port Clinton, Ohio: 12
Current expectation for GDP growth in the 4th quarter: 2%
Worldwide gross for Wonka in its opening weekend: $150 million
Prison sentence for Catholic Cardinal Giovanni Angelo Becciu after being found guilty of fraud: 5.5 years
Estimated number of Slinkys that have been sold since their release in 1945: 360 million
Original and current price of a Slinky: $1 / $5
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Good morning…
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CHEERS to focusing on the important stuff. Now that the Republican House leadership has adjourned for the rest of the year, here's a complete summary—annotated in the most minute detail possible—of their accomplishments this year. We suggest you start a big chant of "USA! USA!" loud enough for your neighbors to hear as you read this amazing list:
❤ Kevin McCarthy was elected Speaker on the 15th round of voting.
❤ Kevin McCarthy was kicked out of the Speakership after 269 days, the shortest term in 140 years.
❤ “MAGA Mike” Johnson, who shares a pornography-monitoring obsession with his 17-year-old son (who is likely watching porn on a device Dear Dad doesn’t know about) and believes he is the second coming of Moses, was elected Speaker on the 1st round of voting.
❤ Rep. George Santos (R-NY) was voted out of Congress for committing financial crimes.
❤ Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) faced no disciplinary action after she and her date were caught groping each other's lady and man parts in a theater during a production of Beetlejuice where children were present.
❤ Brawls broke out between Republican representatives.
❤ An impeachment inquiry was opened on President Biden, minus two small details: charges and evidence.
What incredible forward-thinking brainpower and resourcefulness. This is why they earn the big bucks, folks. Memo to Chuck Schumer over in the Senate: reducing the cost of health care, lowering inflation, saving the planet and filling the potholes are for losers.
CHEERS to today’s edition of Well Now I Know That Pigs Can Fly. Courtesy of Axios:
Pope Francis approved allowing priests to bless same-sex couples under certain circumstances, the Vatican announced Monday.
Why it matters: The rule change affirms and expands on a progressive shift to Roman Catholic Church doctrine around blessings proposed by Francis in a letter he sent two conservative cardinals earlier this year.
This has been today’s edition of Well Now I Know That Pigs Can Fly.
CHEERS to home sweet teeth-chattering home. On December 19, 1777, George Washington parked his 11,000 troops at Valley Forge for the winter. The General knew how to rally his men:
"Look, all we need to do, guys, is invent central heating after creating a regional power grid and it'll be just like a Sandals resort! Plus I know a great caterer and he'll be along just as soon as we invent the smartphone app."
Needless to say, it was a very long winter.
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BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK
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CHEERS and JEERS to green shoots and brown leaves. Some holly jolly economic headlines I rounded up today to hang from the tree…
- '24 Fed interest rate cuts will be good for Biden
- Gas price decline hits 13th straight week as national average inches closer to $2.99
- U.S. economy still resilient as retail sales beat expectations, layoffs stay low
- Illicit content on Elon Musk's X draws E.U. investigation
- Workers and consumers say they're likely to favor pro-LGBTQ businesses, study finds
- Passport wait times drop to pre-pandemic lows
- Biden administration to impose inflation penalties on dozens of drugs
- Americans hit the gas on shopping, travel and restaurants
- As mortgage rates fall, homebuilders are feeling good about the housing market again
- Support for TikTok ban crumbles, even among Republicans
And some lumps of coal for the stockings…
- Older workers are a growing share of the American workforce
- US Steel, once the world’s largest corporation, agrees to sell itself to a Japanese company
- Homelessness in America surges to record high amid high rents
- BP suspends all oil shipments through the Red Sea as attacks escalate
- Escalating U.S.-China tech war could hurt American companies
And under the tree, topped with a bright red bow: a glass of champagne, a bottle of Maalox, and another year of whiplash insurance.
JEERS to running out of time. Just a little reminder that if you have a flexible spending account as part of your health insurance plan, it's likely that you'll lose whatever money you have socked away if you don’t spend it within the next 12 days. Some things that are usually eligible: birth control, smoking cessation, cold remedies (NyQuil: humankind's greatest gift to itself), contact lens solution...stuff like that. But if your remaining balance is sizable enough, we'd advise you to buy something that'll deliver the most bang for your pre-tax buck: conservative Supreme Court justices.
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Ten years ago in C&J: December 19, 2013
JEERS to the Kum By Yah mirage. Watching the fawning and crowing and marveling at the "new birth of bipartisanship" on Capitol Hill makes it sound like the House and Senate are full of babies who just performed their first solo poopies. "Yaaaay! You did it! Good widdle boys and girls! You made a happy doody tootsie roll, yes you did!" Jeebus…they're acting like they deserve the freakin' Nobel Peace Prize. It's just a mundane budget, and not a very good one at that. If anyone cares, the screw-the-long-term-unemployed piece of sausage passed the Senate yesterday 64-36, and President Obama will sign it. It's a budget. A center-right budget. Whee.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to 72 seconds with America's future. Zander Moricz is a student at Harvard, and before that he went to school in Sarasota, Florida. That county's school board includes book-banning, MAGA loon Bridget Ziegler, a co-founder of "Moms for Liberty." Same lady who just got caught having three-ways with her husband (the chair of the Florida Republican party now being accused of rape) and another woman. Last week at the last school board meeting of the year, Zander took advantage of the public-comment period to give Bridget a good talking to. And viral it went…
Moral of the story: people like Zander Moricz are why people like Bridget Ziegler avoid reality-based humanoids at all cost. Here endeth the lesson.
Have a tolerable Tuesday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
“You know what? I wouldn’t splash in the Cheers and Jeers kiddie pool now if Bill in Portland Maine gave me a million dollars.”
—Cher
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