Happy Holidays, Kossacks! From a small group of dedicated activists scattered across the globe, I bring you a present in the fight for LGBT equality. Servicemembers United is announcing the launch of the Campaign For Military Partners.
Those of us who are the civilian partners of LGBT active duty, Reserve, or Guard troops have to live our lives in the closet just as much as our partners do. We face unique hardships while supporting our soldiers, our sailors, our airmen, our Marines, our Coasties. We cannot speak freely to our loved ones when they deploy. We have no access to military-provided healthcare. We have no access to support networks that heterosexual spouses enjoy. We have no access to bases, or to privileges such as commissary benefits, which for many of us would make a big financial difference in this time of economic crisis.
We don't get notified if they are injured or killed in the line of duty.
To this end, Servicemembers United has formed an advocacy group just for us. More below the fold.
Servicemembers United is announcing the launch of the Campaign For Military Partners.
Perhaps the most unrecognized and underappreciated group associated with the gay military, veteran, and defense community, the civilian partners of gay and lesbian military personnel endure many of the same hardships as the active duty partner, yet they get access to few, if any, of the perks, resources, and benefits of being affiliated with the U.S. military. In following their active duty other-halves from duty station to duty station, civilian military partners often experience unique forms of stress and isolation, particularly while their partners are on deployment.
Servicemembers United has launched a new campaign to reach out to, recognize, connect, and support the civilian partners of active duty military personnel. In addition to encouraging civilian military partners to join the SU network in order to stay connected to news, events, and other SU members, SU is adding a new military partner blog to its portfolio of SU member blogs in order to include that perspective to the already wide-ranging set of perspectives captured in the SU member blogs. You can check out the new blog, called Soldier’s Husband, here, or you can find it on the site under News>Member Blogs.
Many of you have read my diary on Pam's House Blend regarding what it's like to be a "Silent Partner". Many of you emailed me to talk about your own experiences. We cannot expect DADT to be repealed any time in the next three to five years, and possibly longer. The White House allergy to anything involving LGBT equality progression, the 2006 Blue Dog takeover in the Senate and the House, and the Democratic party's standard spine-removal procedure have quite effectively ensured that. We have to be our own advocates, our own military family.
The Military Partners' Group is one-third DADT repeal lobby organization, and two-thirds LGBT family advocacy org. It is our hope that as more and more Americans hear about the hardships our military families face, the outrage will grow, and the public call for repeal will be too loud for a hostile President and a spineless Congress up for re-election to ignore. Our vision for ourselves is to have an advocacy group, our own military family, that takes care of its own, takes care of each other. We are still in the beginning stages of this project, and would love to hear from other "Silent Partners." We need input. What do other partners need? Where are you? Do you want an online support group? Community resources such as confidential counseling services? A list of welcoming and affirming faith communities in your area? Information on an area you are PCSing to? Go to the SU website or email info@servicemembersunited.org. Just be sure to put "Military Partners" in the subject line.
CNN.com did a story this morning on the plight of LGBT troops, and specifically that of our families.
Civilian partners of those in Iraq and Afghanistan face some unique challenges, too.
"It's definitely one of the most difficult things I've ever been through. There really is no support. You feel all alone," said Brad, a partner of a service member who asked that his full name not be used because of the sensitivity of the subject.
Brad contributes to Servicemembers United's "Soldier's Husband" blog, which details what civilian partners face, including not being notified if a partner is killed in action.
Anyone who has been a LGBT troop, or a partner, what are/were your needs? What did/does your family need? How can we be a successful advocacy organization, a successful military family for those of us who are silent and closeted? Do you have knowledge of community resources for people in our situation? Email me, email SU, or leave suggestions in the comments.
Happy Holidays, everyone. Peace on Earth, and Goodwill towards all humankind.
cross-posted at Pam's House Blend.