From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE…
Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment
Taking a quick break from watching the Republicans destroy the country in real time for a brief message to the 54 percent of Democrats who now have a favorable opinion of the last president who tried to lay waste to our democracy:
BAD DEMOCRATS! BAD! WTF ARE YOU THINKING?!!
I know memories fade and all, but good god. I (and, no doubt, you) could cite reason after valid reason why George W. Bush’s eight years circa 2001-2009 were such a shit show. Instead I’ll turn it over to the late, great Molly Ivins, who wrote a sizzling column just before the 2006 midterm elections, when we were in the thick of #43’s reign of error and terror. Molly issues a still-pertinent warning about GOP sleaze tactics and the dangers of pre-election overconfidence, but also rains down an avalanche of reasons why Bush (and ghouls Cheney, Rumsfeld and the rest) should forever be banished into the wilderness with no hope of redemption:
May I remind you what this election is about? Abu Ghraib, Guantanamo, unprecedented presidential powers, unmatched incompetence, unparalleled corruption, unwarranted eavesdropping, Katrina, Enron, Halliburton, global warming, Cheney's secret energy task force, record oil company profits…
FEMA, the Supreme Court, Diebold, Florida in 2000, Ohio in 2004, Terri Schiavo, stem cell research, golden parachutes, shrunken pensions, unavailable and expensive health care, habeas corpus, no weapons of mass destruction, sacrificed soldiers and Iraqi civilians, wasted billions, Taliban resurgence, expiration of the assault weapons ban, North Korea, Iran, intelligent design, swift boat hit squads, and on and on. …
Bush ran on a pledge of "restoring honor and integrity" to the White House. Instead, he brought us Tom DeLay, Roy Blunt, Katherine Harris, John Doolittle, Jerry Lewis, Richard Pombo, Mark Foley, Dennis Hastert, David Safavian, Jack Abramoff, Ralph Reed, Karl Rove and an illegal and immoral war in Iraq.
And then there was the second terror attack on our country, the one in 2008 by the banksters we now call The Great Recession that Bush’s Democratic successor had to spend his entire first term and part of his second digging us out of with zero Republican help. Remember that?
On the positive side, “only” 43 percent of Americans identifying themselves as card-carrying liberals in the CNN poll view Captain Mission Accomplished favorably. That’s because most of us remember our history and we’re not suckers for his post-presidential artist-in-residence act.
Some people might be inclined to say, “Yeah, but compared to Trump…” I urge them to read Molly’s list again and note the overlap. (You can substitute Maria for Katrina, and add deficit-exploding tax cuts for the rich to both.)
Fifty-four percent of Democrats---Democrats---have a favorable view of George W. Bush. I really wish Molly was still around, but I’m glad she’s not around to see that.
Cheers and Jeers starts below the fold...
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, January 25, 2018
Note: The Federal Bureau of Government Shutdown Management has been shut down due to the lack of a federal shutdown to manage. We are working diligently to resolve this situation, and we apologize for any lack of inconvenience you may be experiencing. Thank you for your patience. ---Gary
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Black History Month: 7
Days `til Setsubun (Shinto celebration of the change of seasons): 9
Cost per taxpayer to bring the new Foxxconn plant in Wisconsin due to the $3 billion in tax breaks the state gave away: $230,000
Percent of respondents in a new CNN poll who say a president should be required to undergo an annual exam that would check for mental health concerns like Alzheimer’s disease: 77%
Number of House seats, out of 18, Republicans hold in Pennsylvania despite having fewer registered Republicans than Democrats in the state: 13
Employment at U.S. breweries in 2017, up from 28,000 in 2001: 69,000
Rank of Bud Light, Coors Lite and Miller Lite among top beer brands in 2017: #1, #2, #3
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Puppy Pic of the Day: New Subaru ad starring the dawg family...
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CHEERS to verdicts worthy of doing a triple-summersault over. Well, it’s over. The former USA Gymnastics doctor who sexually abused more than a hundred of the girls and women who put their trust in him will only see the light of day again during his daily 20 minutes in a prison yard. It was a textbook case for how sexual abuse cases should be handled, and…
That's thanks to Circuit Court Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, who opened her courtroom to a parade of survivors, parents and coaches affected by [Larry] Nassar's abuse---letting each say their piece, while encouraging them and placing blame firmly on their abuser.
“The monster who took advantage of you is going to wither, much like the scene in the Wizard of Oz where the water gets poured on the witch and the witch withers away," Aquilina, 59, told one victim last week, per CNN.
"That’s what’s going to happen to him, because as you get stronger, as you overcome---because you will---he gets weaker and he will wither away.”
“You may find it harsh, [Mr. Nassar], that you are here listening but nothing is as harsh as what your victims endured for thousands of hours at your hands, collectively. You spent thousands of hours perpetrating criminal sexual conduct on minors. Spending four or five days listening to them is significantly minor considering the hours of pleasure you had their expense and ruining their lives.”
Judge Aquilina saved her most inspiring words for gymnast Rachael Denhollander, who was the first victim to speak up: "You started the tidal wave. You made all of this happen. You made all of these voices matter. Your sister survivors and I thank you. You are the bravest person I have ever had in my courtroom." Nassar, meanwhile, won’t be able to walk out of the prison gate a free man until 2195. Or, as most people will call it: too soon.
JEERS to America: land of the guns, home of the gun nuts.
What happens in the wake of the massacre in Newtown Aurora Binghamton Tucson Santa Barbara Charleston Lafayette Roseburg Kalamazoo Orlando Alexandria Las Vegas etcetera etcetera etcetera Marshall County High School in Benton, Kentucky during what was supposed to be a normal school day (2 killed, 18 wounded by a good guy with a gun right up until he became a bad guy with a gun) is depressingly predictable: The community will grieve. Gun control advocates will wisely suggest that this might be a good time to review our federal and state firearms policies so that our nation's shameful record of gun violence might be improved upon. The president and his minions will blame Democrats for the carnage and urge every living soul and their pets to arm themselves to the teeth, and the NRA will continue scaring politicians into looking the other way by informing them that, "We'll be scoring you on your response." Like I said, predictable. Depressingly.
P.S. Heckuva job, consoler-in-chief:
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JEERS to little misunderstandings. I imagine this is another reason Trump loves Norway besides the color of their lily-white skin: they almost started a nuclear war (and Trump looooves him some nuclear war). On this date in 1995, the Norwegians fired a scientific rocket called a Black Brant XII into the air, and the Russians thought it might actually be an American Trident missile launched from a sub. What happened next was so hilarious…
As a result, fearing a high altitude nuclear attack that could blind Russian radar, Russian nuclear forces were put on high alert...
...and the nuclear weapons command suitcase was brought to Russian president Boris Yeltsin.
[He] then had to decide whether or not to launch a retaliatory nuclear strike against the United States.
The Norwegian rocket incident was the first and only incident where any nuclear weapons state had its nuclear briefcase activated and prepared for launching an attack.
How lucky was the world on January 25, 1995? Let me put it this way: the incident happened on the one day of his presidency when Boris Yeltsin wasn't drunk. That lucky.
CHEERS to famous fetal firsts. Congrats to Senator Tammy Duckworth (D-IL) and husband Bryan on the news that they’re expecting their second kidlet (following four-year-old daughter Abigail). Bit of Capitol Hill history being made here…
She would become the first senator to give birth in office, though not the first member of Congress. Ten members of the House of Representatives have had children while serving in the chamber. […]
A spokeswoman for the freshman senator told the Sun-Times that Duckworth is approximately six months pregnant.
She added that her experiences as a working mother have given her a particular perspective serving in Congress, where she has championed issues affecting working families.
“Parenthood isn’t just a women’s issue, it’s an economic issue and an issue that affects all parents---men and women alike,” she said.
Because you pay me to think about these things, last night I bolted upright in bed at 3am with a horrific thought. Which is why I called Chuck Schumer at 3:01 to demand that he get, in writing, a guarantee from Republicans that they won’t use some arcane Senate rule to block the delivery of a bouncing baby Democrat. Because you know someone will try. And I assume after reading that sentence the first two words out of your mouth were: “Ted Cruz.”
CHEERS to naughty nature. Scientists say a region of Antarctica has been experiencing a swelling magma bulge, which has caused the crust around the area to rise. Scientists say there’s nothing to be alarmed about at the moment:
This magma plume isn't an alternative possible cause of recent upticks in melting along the West Antarctic Ice Sheet attributed to human-generated climate change. The plume is far older than the recent period of atmospheric warming; indeed, at 50 million to 110 million years old, it's older than our species and the West Antarctic Ice Sheet itself. The plume has been a factor in the ice sheet's behavior throughout its history, and recent surges in melting are the result of all the additional heat humans have pumped into it.
But they did warn the continent that if it lasts for more than four more millennia, it should see a volcanologist.
CHEERS to meeting the press. Fifty-seven years ago today, in 1961, President Kennedy gave the first press conference that was broadcast live on both TV and radio. Not having done it before, the early moments were a bit awkward:
"I want to assure you that I will, with great vigah, endeavuh to ahnsuh your questions thoroughly and completely. Just not in the bahthroom while I am taking my, uh, shauwuh."
Things went better when they moved it to the press room.
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Ten years ago in C&J: January 25, 2008
JEERS to "An Army of Duh." The Army's recruitment goal is to maintain a fighting force where 90 percent of recruits have high school diplomas. The current level is 71 percent, and it's been under 90 percent for the last four years. And when they come back from Iraq and Afghanistan we hope they run for congress...to raise its IQ.
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And just one more…
JEERS to peeple who probibully shu’dnt be onn thuh road. (h/t Joe.My.God.) The owner of this fine American vehicle has a message for…honestly, I dunno. Let’s take a wild guess and say the Marxist Muslims running the deep state via a secret transmitter in Mueller’s molars, as reported on Fox News by Sean Hannity. Whoever it’s for, he seems to be pretty adamant about it...
As for what the actual message is he’s trying to communicate? Well, that’s a tough one. If I had to guess, I’d say it’s “Kids, stay in school and study hard or you’ll end up like me.”
Have a stand-up Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial:
Senator Susan Collins was just told that Ted Cruz claimed to be consistently against splashing in the Cheers and Jeers kiddie pool. She stood there, mouth literally agape, for several seconds before saying "you've rendered me speechless."
---Paul McLeod
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