I bet you thought HIllary’s middle name is Rodham, right? Wrong!
Now that her true identity has been revealed by Christian apocalyptic author Tom Horn, we know her name to really be Hillary Mystery, Babylon the Great, the Mother of Prostitutes and Abominations of the Earth Clinton. It has a nice ring to it but I have to wonder how she gets the whole thing into forms and onto her driver’s license. Then again, anything is possible with the awesome mystical powers she has as the Whore of Babylon, I suppose.
Yesterday Skywatch TV — whose CEO just happens to be the aforementioned Tom Horn — released its latest video on Youtube. The title is “Belly of the Beast” and if you guessed that its theme involves satanic forces (aka liberals) at work in Washington, DC then you win a trip to visit Pat Robertson resting in his crypt between reanimations for his shows.
So Tom Horn embarked on an excited explanation of how Hillary’s demonic nature came to be. It seems that L. Ron Hubbard — way back when he was just a bad sci-fi author instead of a demented narcissist cult leader — and his pal Jack Parsons engaged in some kind of ritualistic sex magic that was intended to incarnate the biblical Whore of Babylon from the Book of Revelation.
There was no flash of light and puff of brimstone followed by a lady clothed in purple and scarlet, holding a golden cup, and inebriated due to over-consumption of the blood of saints and martyrs. In fact, nothing happened at all.
However, Hillary the She-Devil is mighty crafty. She waited a year and then appeared to Jack Parsons in a dream and told him that she had been born on Earth and one day would rise and bring the Antichrist to power over all of Creation — and just to be sure that he couldn’t track her down and eliminate her as a threat to humanity, she gave him a phony name that would totally deceive him and wasn’t at all like her real name: Hilarion (which, by the way, is a masculine name and the name of a Catholic saint, which just proves her deviltry as a gender-confounding feminazi and her contempt for Jeebus and his saints).
Well, that ancient bit of deflection didn’t fool Tom Horn, no siree, Bob! He pegged her as the Hellish Harlot right off and explains how she will run again in 2020 and this time she will win and bring her Dark Master to rule the White House, the nation, and the world! Hillary didn’t realize she was up against someone who
… received the highest degree honorary doctorate in 2007 from legendary professor Dr. I.D.E. Thomas [some relatively unknown Baptist pastor — Krotor] for his research into ancient history …
so he’s nobody’s everybody’s fool.
If you haven’t fainted yet from the terror of Hillary’s head spinning around like an incubus-ensorcelled Water Wiggle and spewing green bile all over Melania’s Redrum Trees of Dead Handmaidens, you might want to watch the video segment.
Before you do, be sure to tie a clove of garlic to your belt — as was the fashion in those days and as is necessary now to protect you from demonic possession.
And, please, folks, remember how acute the economic anxiety is of these people. If we just try to empathize a bit — and admit that all of us Democrats are really Demon-rats and devil-worshippers — they will come around and embrace civility, rationality, and civic spirit once again.
Thanks to:
Wonkette — Lunatic: Scientology Knocked Up Hillary Clinton's Mom With The For-Real Whore Of Babylon, So ... Okay!
RightwingWatch — Is Hillary Clinton The Whore of Babylon?