Cheers and Jeers is a multi-pixel weekday post from the great state of Maine.
An Open Letter
Dear Donald Trump, Tulsi Gabbard, Bernie Sanders, Elizabeth Warren, Joe Biden, Pete Buttigieg, Amy Klobuchar, Mike Bloomberg, Tom Steyer, William Weld, and all the Write-in-Candidates,
Please do something about your supporters. I mean, jeez, come on.
Sincerely,
All the Write-in Candidates, William Weld, Tom Steyer, Mike Bloomberg, Amy Klobuchar, Pete Buttigieg, Joe Biden, Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, Tulsi Gabbard and Donald Trump
Let us Continue…
Cheers and Jeers for Monday, February 24, 2020
Note: If you have a pardon, leave a pardon. If you need a pardon, take a pardon.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til the Democratic debate in South Carolina: 1
Days 'til the Marathon Seafood Festival in the Florida Keys: 19
Factor by which the number of U.S. alcohol-related deaths rose between 1999 and 2017, according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism: 2x
Age group that saw the highest increase in cirrhosis-related deaths: 25-34
Total subscribers to Barack Obama's various social media feeds: 194 million
Total subscribers to Trump's social media feeds: 117 million
Trump's current aggregate approval rating at FiveThirtyEight, two weeks after the media swooned over a single Gallup poll showing him at 49%: 43%
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Puppy Pic of the Day: Santa-in-training FAIL…
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CHEERS to pulling the lever on the one-armed bandit and coming up WIN-WIN-WIN. It was a happy weekend for Bernie Sanders as he won the Nevada caucus (which he lost in 2016 to Hillary) by a decisive margin—3,287% to everyone else's 17%. A few details on the Bern that was felt in the bunny ranch state...
One of the major question marks for Sanders coming into Nevada was whether he could win with more than just his core base that fueled his winning a quarter of the vote in Iowa and New Hampshire.
Well, on Saturday, he did that.
Sanders won not only with voters under 30 and people who identify as very liberal, but also with men, women, Hispanics (overwhelmingly), voters 45 to 64 and people with and without college degrees, according to polls conducted as voters entered caucus sites. He also did well among black voters and moderates, finishing a close second to Joe Biden with both groups that are supposed to be the former vice president's base.
Now the wagon train packs up the tents and tin pots and drives the mules down to South Carolina, for Saturday's primary in—[checks notes]—South Carolina. Or as the locals call it: "Bloomberg Country!" But only when they're drunk and well paid.
CHEERS to them meddling city dwellers. Looks like the fine, America-loving folks in Pittsburgh, Philly, Detroit, Milwaukee, Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati and other major metro areas in swing states are aware of the stakes in 2020, and they're more committed to getting to the polls than the red-hatted cultists:
Americans’ interest in voting is growing faster in large cities dominated by Democrats than in conservative rural areas, according to an analysis of Reuters/Ipsos national opinion polls. […]
The advantage in urban political engagement extends deep into the most competitive battleground states that Trump won by razor-thin margins four years ago, the data shows.
In large urban areas of the upper Midwest, a region that includes swing states Michigan and Wisconsin, for example, the number of people who said they were “certain” to vote in the upcoming presidential election rose by 10 percentage points to 67% compared with survey responses from 2015 [versus only 1% in smaller towns].
This is terrible. If the city folk come out and boot Trump and his Russian wrecking ball, why, we'll all start guzzling bottles of champagne and smoking boxes of cigars. Those things can kill ya!
JEERS to today's edition of "Yeah, but…" Exciting news from Florida! The First lady done went and got herself plaqued by the God squad:
First lady Melania Trump touted her “Be Best” program...as she accepted an award Wednesday from a Florida Christian college. The first lady told the 550 attendees at Palm Beach Atlantic University's “Women of Distinction” luncheon that her anti-cyber bullying initiative “has been shining a light on programs across the country and overseas that help our youth understand what it means to Be Best.”
Yeah, but…
Two kindergartners in Utah told a Latino boy that [Melania Trump’s husband] would send him back to Mexico, and teenagers in Maine sneered ‘‘Ban Muslims’’ at a classmate wearing a hijab. In Tennessee, a group of middle-schoolers linked arms, imitating the [First Lady’s husband’s] proposed border wall as they refused to let nonwhite students pass. In Ohio, another group of middle-schoolers surrounded a mixed-race sixth-grader and, as she confided to her mother, told the girl, ‘‘This is [Melania Trump’s husband’s] country.’’
Since [Melania Trump’s husband’s] rise to the nation’s highest office, his inflammatory language—often condemned as racist and xenophobic—has seeped into schools across America. Many bullies now target other children differently than they used to, with kids as young as 6 mimicking the [First Lady’s husband’s] insults and the cruel way [her husband] delivers them.
This has been today's edition of "Yeah, but…" And congrats on your piece of tin, ma’am.
CHEERS to rendering Rachel Maddow speechless. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does it's a wonder to behold. Eleven years ago today, despised Louisiana governor, failed presidential nominee and creepy exorcism advocate Bobby Jindal loped into a southern foyer scented with jasmine and gave his famous "Welcome to Mayberry" response to President Obama's address to Congress. The ensuing rhetorical disaster, during which, among other things, he invoked the government response to Katrina as an example of why Republicans should be trusted more than Democrats, provided an unforgettable moment in mass pundit shock…
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A few years back Jindal had a brief moment of lucidity when he called the GOP "The stupid party." Little did we know back then that he apparently meant it as a compliment.
CHEERS to Bill in Portland Maine: Uncommonly Sensible Advice Columnist. Today's letter from the mailbag comes from my senior senator:
Dear Billeh the Uncommonly Sensible Advice Columnist,
As Maine’s senior senator, I'm troubled by the latest polls showing me losing to my likely rival, SHE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED. Before she came along, everything was fine. I could bamboozle my way through life by posturing as a sensible moderate while stabbing my constituents in the back on everything from abortion rights to health care.
But since SHE started opening her yap, my poll numbers are collapsing and everybody hates me. I've expressed my grave concern to reporters. I've emphatically insisted that I hope Trump has learned his lesson after I voted to give him a free pass for trying to extort a foreign country into rigging the 2020 election. I've even stomped around my office making frowny faces, all to no avail.
I'm literally out of ideas. What should I do, Billeh?
—Senator Going Crazy in DC
Dear Senator Going Crazy: Resign. Hugs, Billeh.
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Ten years ago in C&J: February 24, 2010
CHEERS to 11 pages that shook the nation. My prediction yesterday of what the White House's health care reform bill would look like—"Not great but good, and probably better than nothing"—was about right, and in lieu of accolades I'll accept your Skittles. Meanwhile, John Cole at Balloon Juice makes an important point about what Democrats need to do to sell this thing. Namely, steal a page out of the well-worn Republican playbook:
"The President expects and believes the American people deserve an up or down vote on health reform," White House communications director Dan Pfeiffer said on the call.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Say it over and over and over again. The first thing out of every Democrat’s mouth in the morning should be "up or down vote" and the last thing they should utter before drifting off to sleep is"up or down vote."
Absolutely. Although they should be prepared for some strange looks if the next-to-last thing they do before drifting off to sleep is have sex.
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And just one more…
CHEERS to moments that can't be erased. As Donald Trump marks Black History Month by not marking Black History Month, let us relive one of the many, many, many events President Barack and First Lady Michelle Obama hosted back when the executive mansion was treated as the people's house instead of the crypt for broken dreams it currently resembles. Four year ago this week, we all danced with them…
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We will again soon, I’m sure. But, damn, the waiting part sucks.
Have a tolerable Monday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial
Anderson Cooper calls bullshit on Bill in Portland Maine's bullshit
—Vanity Fair
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