From the GREAT STATE OF MAINE...
Harriett Miers, meet the late-night crew...
"Big news this morning at the White House, President Bush defended his nominee, Harriet Miers, calling her 'plenty bright.' Not only that, but then the president said Miers has 'real purdy hair.' Then he got on a mule and headed south."
--Conan O'Brien
"She's never been a judge before...never served on the bench. This is part of President Bush's strategy of surrounding himself with people who are also in over their heads." --Jay Leno
"Welcome to the 'Late Show,' ladies and gentlemen. It's like the Supreme Court, anyone can get in here."
--David Letterman
"As you might expect some people are criticizing the pick, especially conservative Republicans who worry that Harriet Miers is too liberal. Other critics say she's not a good pick because she hasn't been a judge before. Uh, had Paula Abdul been a judge before? Nobody had a problem when they picked her."
--Jimmy Kimmel
"Well, certainly the president can claim executive privilege. But in the this case, I think with a lifetime appointment to the Supreme Court, you can't play, you know, Hide the Salami, or whatever it's called."
--Howard Dean on Hardball
And, as usual, the political cartoonists waste no ink.
Y'know, it's just too easy. Like shooting cronies in a barrel...
Cheers and Jeers starts in There's Moreville... [Swoosh!!] RIGHTNOW! [Gong!!]
Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, October 6, 2005
Note: C&J always buys jeans with extra room in the hips, thus eliminating our need to carry a briefcase.
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By the Numbers:
Days 'til Canadian Thanksgiving: 4
Days 'til Daylight Saving Time ends: 24
Amount FEMA paid Carnival Cruise Lines to house Katrina evacuees in three of its boats for 6 months: $236 million
Normal cost per person for a 7-day western Caribbean cruise from Galveston: $599
Average weekly cost per Katrina evacuee, based on the current 50% occupancy rate: $2,550
(Source: Time magazine)
Number of questions Clarence Thomas asked during yesterday's session of the Supreme Court: 0
Number of letters in "Duh": 3
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Your Puppy Pic of the Day "How the blazes did I end up in Albuquerque??
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CHEERS to the quagmire in GOoPerville. C&J goes on record: we have never seen such a right-wing meltdown in our life. The knuckledragger-worshippers have spent so much time on their knees that they have no idea what to do now that the head Humpty Dumptys inside the beltway have taken a great fall (and there are more tumbles to come). The take-home message has nothing to do with gloating. It is simply this: Damn, those Founding Fathers knew what they were doing.
JEERS to awful sneak previews. We read yesterday that Alan Greenspan is stepping down in a little over 3 months, and President Bush is looking for a replacement. Then we noticed that Billmon has an exclusive preview of Bush's choice. Suddenly the investment option known as "Under the Mattress Fund" looks mighty bullish.
CHEERS to that little shred of decency. In a 90-9 vote last night, the Senate passed a bill the forbids "cruel, inhuman and degrading treatment" by U.S. troops. Says sponsor John McCain: "The enemy we fight has no respect for human life or human rights. This is about who we are. These are the values that distinguish us from our enemies." And, oddly enough, our president.
BAM! POW! BIFF! to Rumblin' Roberts. A transcript of his encounter with Oregon's senior assistant attorney general Robert Atkinson yesterday:
Atkinson Good morning. I...
Roberts Zip it!
Atkinson But I...
Roberts Zip it!
Atkinson But I...
Roberts Zip it!
Atkinson But I...
Roberts You're in contempt!
Atkinson ...out here in the parking lot??
Whew...30 years of this guy, huh?
CHEERS to Republican gaffes. And this was a biggun': On October 6, 1976, President Ford claimed that there was "no Soviet domination in Eastern Europe." The GOP let 72 hours pass before correcting the gaffe, giving Jimmy Carter and the Dems time to chew him up and spit him out. So tell me again why today isn't a national holiday?
JEERS to the ol' bait and switch. (via ThinkProgress) Author and blogger David Kline was invited on The O'Reilly Factor Tuesday for what he thought would be an honest discussion of political blogs. Instead, he got sucked into Falafel Bill's diatribe against Media Matters, which kind of pissed him off:
I have two regrets about my appearance. First, not being familiar with Media Matters, I could not defend them or refute O'Reilly's and [Jed] Babbin's accusations. And second, I wish I had managed to tell O'Reilly that, given his national forum and his audience of millions, he was just being a baby for whining about being criticized by bloggers.
Considering their audience, you were better off saving your breath.
P.S. Three quick words for Bill and last night's guest, right-wing blogger Paul Mirengoff of Powerline: Get a room.
JEERS to the upheaval of western civilization. (via gossip columnist Atrios) This is bad...really bad. America absorbed the fallout from Brad and Jen's divorce. Will we be able to coalesce as a nation to heal ourselves from the split of Nick and Jessica?? Only if the Federal Emergency Management Agency acts fast enough. Ice! Now!!
CHEERS to Grizzly Family Values. A mother bear was shot and killed last summer while hunting for fish in Alaska's Russia River. Her male cub was shot in the leg. But locals and tourists say the cub's female sibling has been keeping an eye on her brother and sharing salmon with him. Sweet.
JEERS to political incest. Oh, this GOP inbreeding is driving me batty. The latest:
Contrary to recommendations from his own internal watchdog, CIA Director Porter Goss will not order disciplinary reviews for a former director, George Tenet, and other officials criticized for their performance before the Sept. 11 attacks. ...
The chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, Sen. Pat Roberts, said he has asked Goss and National Intelligence Director John Negroponte to appear before his committee to discuss the decision on the review boards.
In a statement, Roberts, R-Kan., said he was "concerned to learn of the director's decision to forgo this step in the process." ...
The families of some Sept. 11 victims want to see the report--and punishments. "We need transparency, and we certainly need accountability," said Kristen Breitweiser, one of the most outspoken advocates among Sept. 11 families.
Memo from Bush: "Please deliver one Medal of Freedom to my good friend Gossie."
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One Year Ago in C&J: October 6, 2004...
The Vice Presidential debate:
CHEERS to John Edwards. Poised, polished, prepared. He skillfully turned the flip-flop tables on his opponent, and raised uncomfortable questions about Halliburton. Not once did we wish you had worn weights in your shoes. Way to go!
JEERS to Dick Cheney. Gruff, growly, but exhibited good gravitas. He zinged Edwards' attendance record big-time when he said, "The first time I ever met you was when you walked on the stage tonight." Ouch!! That's gonna hurt the Democrats. "Big-time." [10/6/05 Update: Of course, now we know Cheney was lying out of his fat ass in front of the American people on national TV. Classy.]
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And just one more...
JEERS to DeLay's defense. Cartoonist Chip Bok reveals how the Bugman plans to get off the hook. Now that's what I call a slam dunk.
Floor's open. What are you cheering and jeering about today?
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Today's Shameless Testimonial in praise of the entire progressive blogosphere:
"They can make stuff up---look, they make stuff about me---up stuff about me every day. Every day of my life. And believe me, I've got to have bodyguards. I've got to have security wherever I go. And it's because of them. I don't fear them. I looooooooath them."
--Bill O'Reilly
10/4/05
