(A shorter version of this was posted by Matt on his site
MichiganLiberal.com on Wednesday Nov. 2, 2005, and the present version was posted at
http://myleftwing.com )
Among other things I make music (have been mentioned in Village Voice etc.), so here's my new rap song "Kwame Got Fat" (with backing track from Sir Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back"), about Kwame Kilpatrick, the much-criticized mayor of Detroit who is challenged by Freman Hendrix in the Tuesday election. (And I believe even Al Sharpton may have pilloried Detroit's self-styled "hip-hop mayor" at Rosa Parks' funeral on Wednesday?)
The lyrics are pasted in at bottom of this mail. The links are http://d-bo.com/... for the lyrics-and-MP3-link page, and http://d-bo.com/... to connect directly to the MP3 without the lyrics. It's a free link, or download, or whatever you call it, so enjoy "Kwame Got Fat" without charge.
(more Kwame below fold)
Besides getting the "endorsement" from the great MichiganLiberal.com site, I was even able to hand a CD of the song to famous Michigan political journalist Jack Lessenberry (see http://jackshow.blogs.com/jack/ for the Jack Lessenberry Show on Michigan Radio) in person about an hour ago or so, on William Street in Ann Arbor. He thanked me for it, before he dashed off to move his car. (Won't complain if he plays "Kwame Got Fat" on his show!)
It would be hideous if Kwame and his mother, Detroit Congresswoman Carolyn Cheeks-Kilpatrick, shamelessly milked Rosa Parks' funeral so that he undeservedly wins the mayoral race. (They're apparently naming a bus depot after Rosa Parks too, which is good, though it might be politically motivated...)
(By way, I am not criticizing Kilpatrick just for being fat--that's no crime--, but for getting that way on public money, going to fancy restaurants all the time on his Detroit city MasterCard, the kind of thing that even the Bible condemns: see the Bible quote I put in the song itself, "Jeremiah 5:27-28,/Their houses are full of fraud,/They grow great and rich, sleek and bloated".)
I hope the song is comprehensible to people not in Michigan. Some stuff you may have to Google, but I will note about the "Lincoln Navigator", that Kwame K. got in a huge controversy by leasing one of those vehicles, a red one, for his wife Carlita, on city money.
Anyway, play away, hey,
- - -
Lyrics to "Kwame Got Fat":
Oh, my gaah. Look at that man Kwame.
He so big. He looks like some
Wannabe hip-hop rapping mayor. "Kwame the Vampire Slayer."
He's a good mayor like Mr. Sulu is heterosexual.
But he act like a total pros'itute.
And he so big and round.
Privileged Congressman's child like George W. Bush.
He's got Libby on the label, and I don't mean vegetables.
And I don't care if he white, brown, or black!
I like big cities and I cannot lie
The sistas and bruthas can't deny
That when a mayor walks in with a great big waist
And an attitude in your face
You get STUNNED, wanna stick out your tongue
`Cause you notice that shirt is stuffed
Huge posse of thuggish bodyguards
Like an OG in the prison yard
Oh Kwame, the press get wit'cha
Try to take your picture
Those homies tried to warn me
But I tell you the truth so you abhor me
Ooh, you took Detroit and spent it,
Broke it, didn't just bend it
Try to use me, use me
You think we're just your groupies
Joe Harris said the city
Goin' bankrupt, that's a pity
Charge 2 hundred thousand dollars
To your city MasterCard
High life and fancy restaurants
Let poor Detroit die hard
Ain't got nothin' against a fat brutha
Unless he get fat off the utha brutha
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has Kwame gone nuts? (Hell yeah!)
Tell `em to take it! (Shake it!) take it! (Shake it!)
Take away that nut!
Kwame got fat!
Bad name out past Oakland county
From Detroit up to the U.P.
As a mayor, you're just a player
Got more jewels than Princess Leia
Kwame got fat!
Jeremiah 5:27-28,
Their houses are full of fraud,
They grow great and rich, sleek and bloated
But you dumped the diamond earring
Cos old preachers you be fearing
Now you about as hip hop
As some southern white cop.
Now here's your scandal
You wanna get folks to Manoogian Mansion
And waste they time--Massage? Manicure? Uh
I hope there ain't no strippers
Let's keep up all our zippers
You think you're real thick and juicy
Your manners ain't that subtle
Kwame's in big trouble
Halloween toil and bubble
So I'm lookin' your campaign video
Watchin' Kwame prance like a ho
You act like a bimbo
You sho' ain't no Flo Jo
Got that red SUV
Your face looks red to me
Your wife got a Lincoln Navigator
You ain't Lincoln, just a master Nader
Kwame ain't got it goin' on
A lot of pimps won't like this song
`Cause them punks ain't been acquitted
And I'd rather spit away
'Cause he's wrong, not strong
Kwame down to get the fiction on
So, ladies! {Yeah!} Ladies! {Yeah}
I wonder if the mayor gone crazy {Yeah!}
Then turn him around! Throw him out?
White and black folks got to shout
Maybe Kwame get sacked!
Hey KK have a nice day!
Kwame go back!
Yeah, baby ...
Watch Kwame, Kwame, Kwame
Run to his Congressman mommy
You run to Mama Cheeks
Cos maybe you is weak
And yo' dad Bernard compared your critics to Nazis
And had to apologize. Ha! What a joke!
Look like you ate Jane Fonda
And maybe not just Fonda
But also Jane Fonda's Hon-da
You're not p-h-a-t
Maybe just f-a-t.
You are so maladroit,
Kilpatrick killed Detroit
You said the suburbs got drugs,
But you is just a race-baiting thug
That ad claimed you was lynched
That's a lie, Mayor Grinch
Claimed "you couldn't party"
You lied, not much of a smarty
That debate with Freman Hendrix
You couldn't say one nice thing
Politeness got swept away
You ain't it, Miss Bling!
Give me a sista, like Rosa Parks
I can't resist her
You insulted Dennis Archer
Who took care of Rosa Parks
Well you ain't no Rosa Parks, pard
and you left Detroit in the dark
So ladies, if Kwame's around,
And he exploits Rosa's funeral now,
Dial 1-900-Kwameee
And send him nasty thoughts
Kwame step back!
Psalm 119:70 Their heart is fat as grease but I delight in your law
Kwame goes splat
The cat and the fiddle, Kwame got much fat
Hey diddle riddle, Kwame got much fat
The cat and the fiddle, Kwame got much fat
Hey diddle riddle, Kwame got much fat
Whooo!!
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Copyright 2005 David Boyle "All rights reserved"