At the moment we say hello to and fall in love with a new pet, we must, at that same moment, recognize that saying hello also means saying goodbye, because our small pets are not meant to outlive us. And so it begins.
I have learned along the path of my life that with every new loss, we grieve again all of the losses that came before it. This makes it important to fully experience the grief every time, as I believe that this is the only mechanism to keep all of our losses from eventually sinking us under their accumulated weight. It also means, for me, that the older I get, the more intensely I hurt.
Some will believe I am just being overly dramatic or pitiful, and that is not my intent. My intention with this diary is to examine and express what I am experiencing now, to get it out of me, to externalize what is tearing me up internally. If you choose not to read, I won't be insulted or offended in any way, as I am writing this - selfishly - for myself.
The real pain is below the curlicue.
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