X-posted at Moon of Alabama
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Your Honor,
let me first thank you for the opportunity to defend myself.
I am here accused of having burned down my neighbor's house.
Did I do so? Did I set fire on my neighbor's house?
Sure, I did. And I have never tried to hide that fact. Did this fire catch other houses too? Yes it did and I am really sorry it took down your house too, but then, yours, like the others, was an old and crumbling houses anyway.
But that is all not to the point. I am the wrong one to be accused here and that is why I reject any guilt in this case.
The only one who should be here in handcuffs and indicted is the locksmith. He is guilty of catastrophic mischief.
Let me tell you why.
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