My mother, with whom I've had a love/dislike relationship for 40+ years died on Friday. She was an amazing woman who could also chap my hide like no other. We were too much alike. She was a devout Catholic (I'm an atheist, after being raised Catholic), a life-long Republican (even though she voted for Carter and Edwards in the primary), and we argued a lot about politics. She was a ardent supporter of the SPCA and Planned Parenthood. She also suffered from Lupus for 54 years.
During the 2008 election she had a McCain/Palin sign out front but she also had a "No on 8" sign, because my brother is gay. I'm sure that made many neighbors scratch their heads. She was a Palin fan until I told her about Palin shooting wolves from the air. Mom was a huge supporter of wolves, having grown up in Montana.
If you'll permit me the honor, I'd like to add what her three kids have written for her funeral:
Patricia Ann Burkley
Dec. 3, 1937 - April 22, 2011
Resident of Sunnyvale
Patricia passed away peacefully on April 22nd after bravely battling lupus for 54 years. She was surrounded by family, including her beloved husband Raymond, children Maribeth, Maureen, Paul, his partner Maroun, her brother Dan, and niece Michelle.
Daughter of Hugh Miller and Mildred Hanson, she was born in Salt Lake City and raised in Idaho and Montana with her three brothers. After graduating from Saint Mary’s College in Kansas she moved to Denver to begin her career as a third-grade teacher. In Denver she met the love of her life, Raymond Burkley, and began the whirlwind courtship that culminated in their marriage on June 10, 1961. The new family moved to Sunnyvale, California in 1967 where Maribeth, Maureen and Paul were raised.
Patricia was active in the school PTA, in AAUW and as a Girl Scout Troop leader. She volunteered as a docent at Santa Clara University and Ming Quong. She was known for her cooking skills, her needlework and her gorgeous rose garden. She also loved to entertain and was the life of any party. She was a second mother to her children’s friends. She routinely invited strays to all the holiday gatherings and her children’s friends angled for an invitation to her dinners. Most of all she was known for her sense of humor and her style.
We are comforted that her family was at her side to say goodbye and happy that she is no longer suffering any pain. We smile thinking that right now she is elbows-deep in gold jewelry, drinking a double Kettle One martini, her beloved dog Brandy by her side and a well-used Chico's credit card in her hand.
Patricia's joie de vivre can be summed up as exciting travel, a good book, a stiff drink, tons of friends and a great smile. She was happiest when traveling and when surrounded by family, everyone laughing and having a great time.
She had a wonderful, sassy spirit, touched many lives and will be dearly missed. Her family thanks you for all the thoughts, prayers, love and support.
Thanks for listening.

