Let's start off today's cheering and jeering with:
Your Daily Horoscope for Monday, March 13
(20 Feb - 20 March)
Use your imagination today, it is an amazing gift. Your mental wanderings will inspire others, though your family still feels mainly shame. Lobbyists: keep a bail bondsman on speed-dial.
(21 March - 20 April)
It's time for a change in your diet; flatulence is NOT part of a good work ethic. Beware the ( \ ) backslash.
(21 April - 21 May)
Yes. Yes. No. Yes. What time? No. Yes. That's okay.
(22 May - 21 June)
You have strong instincts and desires, but your best feature is still your flailing. Something moist will enter the scene very soon. Don't forget your camera.
Okay, okay, so I made those up.... you can find your real horoscope HERE.
"undergoing some maintenance right now".... "undergoing some maintenance right now"....
Your faux Monday playground begins right now in "Where's Moresville?"... <Smoosh>... huh?... <SPLAT!>
Aw, man, that's a PIZZA! Who the hell took the gong now?!? BIIIIIILLLLLLLL!!!!!
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