I got a phone call this morning from someone claiming to be from "Planned Parenthood." This did not go well.
The woman on the phone asked for me by name. Good Morning, Mr. Cthulhu, I'm calling you from Planned Parenthood.
Good morning, said I.
I'm calling you today because we need your help to fight to help protect Roe v Wade.... [blah blah blah].
At this point, I interrupted. And that's when things got weird.
Excuse me, I said. You are calling me to ask me for a donation, and, before you launch into your normal schpiel, let me ask you a question. What has your organization done effectively during the past year to lobby to protect abortion rights?*
No, that's a different organization. Our organization educates people about the existence of Roe v. Wade.
Huh? People don't know about Roe v. Wade??
No. People don't know about Roe. Of the ten calls I made prior to you, noine people had never heard of Roe.
OK, maybe its possible that people might not know about the name of the case. But people understand that...
You're wrong. People today don't know about Roe.
That seems very unlikely to me. I mean, there's no one in the world who doesn't undersstand that Roe was the case that created abortion. Its discussed constantly.
Sir, you're just wrong. That's what our organization does. It educates people about Roe v. Wade.
Um...really? That doesn't seem like a particularly good use of your time. I mean, if you are a lobbying organization....
We aren't a lobbying organization. Your deduction to us is tax-deductible.
What? You are a charity? That doesn't make any sense. You don't lobby? What do you use the money for?
We need the money to help our members educate congress and convince them to protect Roe.
That is lobbying.
No, it isn't. You don't need to be a lobbyist to write letters. Do you write letters to Congress?
Yes, I do. But I don't get paid to do it....
We don't get paid, either.
THEN WHY DO YOU WANT MONEY FROM ME?
We need it to educate people about Roe.
Ma'am, this doesn't make any sense. If you are trying to influence policy, you are a lobbying organization, and my donation can't be tax deductible. If you are an "educational" organization, I can't see how calling people to tell them the news about Roe v. Wade is particularly effective...
You are twisting my words, sir. If you won't give us a donation, that's fine. Good day.
* * * * *
OK, I'm a jerk. I should have just said I wouldn't donate (I already give a lot of money to Planned Parenthood, both its action wing and to its clinics). But now, after hours of playing this out in my mind, I can't figure out whether this was a scam, or the person was misinformed as to the tax status of the donations, or whether they really expected mponey from me so thagt they could tell people about Roe v. Wade.
So, can someone please enlighten me?