Hot on the hells of Raybin's
extraordinary revelations about "Jeff Gannon", my inside sources have let me know there's a new breaking story.
It's amazing. It will make even the biggest skeptics turn into true believers. It will destroy all previous doubts that "Jeff Gannon" was a fraud.
In fact, he's anything but a fraud.
Hold your breath... turn the page for the story.
Famous people have a way of showing up in the strangest places. Sometimes they even show up on food. For instance, Jesus made his appearance on a
tortilla in New Mexico.
Not to be outdone, Elvis showed up on a tortilla in December 2004 (story), as you can see in this picture.
But perhaps the most amazing was the Virgin Mary's appearance on a piece of grilled cheese toast, which sold for a whopping $28,000 on eBay.
Well, my friends, the news that you've been waiting for...
Jeff Gannon has appeared on a piece of toast!
Yes, it's true.
According to the e-mail I received, this morning, George W. was having breakfast...
He had taken a couple of bites out of a piece of toast, when he looked at it and gasped. Laura said "George, what is it?" (you see, she was worried, because bad things tend to happen to George when he's eating.)
"Look, Laura," he said, pointing to his plate "That's our little friend Jeffrey on that piece of toast!"
They called for Karl Rove, who came running as fast as his plump little feet would carry him.
Interviewed later, Rove was quoted as saying "Fabulous... that's the hottest little piece of toast I've ever, ever seen... except when I was at a parade - oh, some hotties there, gotta tell ya..."
George quickly called one of his prayer meetings in the Oval Office. Without Congressional approval, it was decided to spend $9 million of the Iraq reconstruction fund money to erect a perfect shrine to house the piece of toast, which George calls "The Most Propagandalisticalest Holy Toast".
Truly, there has never been a greater day in White House history.
Oh yeah, and since this diary needs to serve some purpose...
What's your fucking problem?
List your problems here. Add propaganda, even.