YES! We nabbed Al Qaida's senior barber today in Iraq, so says Reuters:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20051015/ts_nm/iraq_barber_dc
"'The Barber's' duties included altering senior al Qaeda in Iraq members' appearances by dying hair color, altering hairstyles and changing facial hair in their efforts to evade capture," the military said in the statement.
...thank god too. I was really getting upset that maniacs like this guy are free to roam the free world. I mean, how many other terrorist organization's "do's" was this bastard primping?
It's pretty evident now that the end is near for Al Qaida. The next time you see a tape of Al-Zwahiri, or the big man OBL himself, they will look all disheveled and mussed up. Wacked out curls flying everywhere, with no semblance of style or panache'. Hah! How we will all crowd around our TV's and laugh!
"Looks like old Osama needs an Extreme makeover!"
"Hey honey, check out the hairdo on that raghead! Looks like he Flowbee'd himself!"
"Ha! They think they can scare us now? What a bunch of no-style ghetto terrorists! Woo!"
And, have we even begun to examine the possible day-to-day military ramifications of this? How can you accurately fire an RPG with greasy chunks of black hair in your face? Imagine wiring up another roadside bomb of unprotected Saddam-bunker RDX as your hastily arranged ponytail keeps flopping on the timer machanism?
There is no doubt that this capture of a dangerous high-level coiffeur will make our troops in Iraq more secure as they put their asses on the line for freedom. Rummy was right...you go to war with the army you have, and if enough of them die each and every goddamned day, you can make significant and meaningful victories such as this.
I'm so glad publicized this success, which obviously show the wonderful progress we are making against the insurgents in Iraq. So very fucking glad.
...ahhh yes, another proud day for the US.