We can all agree that the War on Christmas is a very sad, confusing thing. How did it get this far? You may read the reports from the front-lines (thank you Hunter), but you might be left asking, "Yes, but what can I do?"
Well, Christian Soldiers, I thought of a way to save Christmas this year. It's a little bit nutty. It's a little bit extreme. It might even be crazy in a sitcomy-Three's-Company sort of way, but it might just work.
Now, before I lay out my plan, I feel it's fair to warn you, I am an atheist. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, I am one of the enemy combatants, but you know what? War is Hell. I'm not crazy about this situation. I don't want to give my life for this cause. I'm offering a white flag, because I think there needs to be a clear victor in this War. I think we need to reach inside of ourselves and decide what sort of nation we want to live in. Do you want to live in a nation of Christian Values? Then here's what I propose.
You've already been out on the front-lines, right? Malls, super-stores, even the evil Internet. You found your deals. You're good at what you do. Your kids will be very happy this CHRISTMAS, and by God, they're going to be consumed with greed, lust, and every imaginable desire on Christmas morning, and they will NOT be disappointed. Not if you have breath in your lungs. That's commendable, but unfortunately, it's not even good enough to win the Great Battle of December 25, let alone the war on Christmas!
Now, I never knew Jesus, but I do admire his work. I think he hung out with criminals, prostitutes, diseased people, beggars, even dead guys. In other words, he reached out to the poor, the lonely, the exiled, the marginalized, the condemned. Say what you will about the man (and again, I don't know him) but he seems to be the sort to love people. I can imagine him playing with dirty children, comforting their mothers, and walking with their fathers. I imagine that he wouldn't let anybody go hungry, if he could stop it. I think he was a political figure, more than a religious one in his lifetime, and I think he was really calling for autonomy and freedom from the Roman empire and persecution.
I think he died for these things.
Do you want to win the war on Christmas? You just need to do one simple thing. Well, it's simple on paper. All battle plans are simple on paper. What you need to win this War is an Army of Jesuses (Jesii?). A million of them or more. I'm talking huge. Where are you going to find all these Saviors?
In your house. Yes, I am proposing that the only way to show the infidels, heathens, atheists, and Jews of your commitment to Christ, your commitment to Christmas, and your commitment to make the USA a Christian Country is to march out your door on Christmas morning with your fellow believers and form an army. To attack the courts? No. To raid the homes of the non-believers? No. Fun as that may be.
No, the army will save the country. Make sure every child has a warm bed and a warm coat. See to it that every hungry person in this nation has a belly full of warm food. Mobilize so every child knows that miracles do happen. I don't want to get corny and preachy, but I tell you what, I sure won't have anything to say to an army of men, women, and children carrying the banner of Christ to continue his work.
You want me to believe. I know you do. It's in your book, after all. Give us all a reason to believe this year. Make the power of Jesus Christ a real, tangible thing. Do His work, because He's not here to do it himself. Win this War in a single, decisive battle that cuts through the pageantry, the greed, the myths, the silly traditions and reveals the simple, sweet truth of Christmas. A little baby was born in a lowly manger to simple, yet good parents in order to bring us all a bit of peace, joy, comfort and hope.
That baby isn't here this year. But you are.
And yet, I write this call to arms with sadness. I have no doubt that many people on the Dkos are already planning to do this. I have no doubt that the people who speak loudest, draw closest to God with their mouths, are furthest from Him in their hearts. The war on Christmas will continue in their minds, because the people who believe that Christmas is under attack don't think about anybody but themselves. They certainly won't stop to consider the people really under attack this year.
Christmas has been officially politicized. The right-wing noise machine shit on the holiday because they don't care. It's all a means to an end. They took a holiday that is a commemoration of a sacred event that many people believe ultimately led to the redemption of all mankind to win political points because they could.
80% of the population identifies as Christian in this nation, one way or the other. If more than 10% of the population of Christians actually celebrates Christmas in a way that honors Christ's life, I'll eat my hat. There is a War on Christmas, but it's not the atheists and other non-Christians fighting it. We're not involved in this one. We're just watching from the sidelines.
This is getting to be far more of a rant and a diatribe than I intended. Why do I even care? It's just another Sunday to me. I plan to watch football (GO BRONCOS!) and drink eggnog until I'm sick...