So I'm on the road doing the whole book signing thing. This is by far the worst week as I'm driving all over God's creation to get to these various signings. Sunday I drove from Memphis to Louisville so I could be in Pittsburgh by Monday afternoon. Last night I did the John McIntyre show and right now I'm in the lobby of WPTT 1360 AM waiting to go on the Lynn Cullen show. After my signing tonight I drive back to Louisville for the big gig with Markos tomorrow before heading to Cleveland and Chicago by Saturday.
Sometimes the cities seem kind of random. Why Pittsburgh and not Cincinnati? Why Louisville and not Indianapolis? And why are they in the order they're in? Driving from Memphis to Louisville to Pittsburgh to Cleveland to Chicago makes sense. Doing what I'm doing doesn't. But it does give me the opportunity to see a lot of stuff I wouldn't have otherwise seen. Here are just some random observations from the last 800 miles of driving...
Is there any such thing as a live armadillo? I only ever seem to see the dead ones fully intact on the side of the road. Between Memphis and Nashville I probably saw about a dozen of them. I'm starting to think that armadillos are born dead on highway shoulders.
Somewhere in Kentucky there's an exit where, on the right there's an "Adult Superstore," and on the left there's a billboard reading "Hell is Real!"
The deer is the armadillo of Ohio.
There's this winding, nightmarish mountain road that starts in Ohio and the speed limit is 55. You get to West Virginia and the limit on the same road goes up to 70, and most folks seem to be doing 90. When you get to Pennsylvania the limit goes back to 55. The only conclusion I can come to is that West Virginia doesn't seem to care if you live or die. Then again, if I lived in West Virginia I might not care either.
Ohio doesn't like to acknowledge the existence of Pittsburgh. The mileage signs on I-71 would rather tell you how far you are from Martin's Ferry or Quaker City or St. Clairsville or ANYTHING but Pittsburgh. I stopped for gas in a place called Donegal and asked "am I even CLOSE to Pittsburgh?" "Yeah," the attendant replied, "you're like maybe 30 minutes away." That was (welcome) news to me.
If you're visiting Pittsburgh for the first time, you absolutely must enter downtown via the Fort Pitt Tunnel. Even if it's out of the way, trust me it's worth it!