There's a lot of talk these days about "family values." Conservative Christians like the term and like to claim that they have a monopoly on them. Progressives, liberals, Democrats, and others say that they also have values. Even though the subject has been talked nearly to death, I've decided to add my two cents worth.
My plan in covering the subject was to make a list of what I consider to be family values: mutual cooperation and support, tolerance of others' opinions and life styles, love and respect, kindness, tolerance, and so on. Then I would contrast my list with expressed family values of conservative evangelical Christian groups: opposition to abortion, hatred of the gay life style, opposition to the gay agenda, sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman, and so on. But before undertaking a short article or post about the subject, I decided to do some research. I googled the subject "family values" and came up with the web site of the American Family Association.
There's a lot of material on the site and lots of references and links to other sites. I haven't yet come up with a list of just what the values of the American Family Association are, but here are a few of them:
- Homosexuality is a sin. It is not due to any biological or genetic condition. It can and should be cured by faith in Jesus.
- Therefore, "marriage" or cohabitation of any kind or intimate relationship between homosexual persons is sinful and should be forbidden by law.
- There is a "gay agenda." It consists of advocating tolerance for persons who engage in homosexual practices and who live in intimate homosexual relationships. Homosexuality is a sin and should never be held up as anything that should be tolerated, let alone encouraged.
- America was founded by people with a deep faith in the Bible. We are a Christian nation and should assert our Christianity.
- Christians are persecuted for expressing their faith. A football coach was censured for leading his team in prayer before each game. A school principal was censured for having a copy of the bible on his desk and for displaying the Ten Commandments in his office.
- Birth control information and easy access to medication such as the "morning after" pill should be kept from teen-age girls. Otherwise they will become sexually active. Girls should not have sexual intercourse until they are married.
- Abortion is murder.
Anyway, this is a partial list. I haven't yet found anything on the AFA website that advocates for the father of the family being the leader and that other members - mother, children - being submissive and obedient. Also, and more importantly, I haven't yet found anything on the website that advocates practicing the humility, the tolerance, the forgiveness, and the love of all persons that one finds in the teachings of Christ as recorded in the New Testament.
Here is my own (partial) list of "family values:"
- We humans should be tolerant of one another. We should not judge nor condemn the life style or actions of others as long as they do no harm to us.
- We should welcome diversity of all kinds: religion, language, skin color, sex, sexual orientation, and national origin. Diversity leads to a more interesting world and a more interesting life.
- We live only once, as far as we know. We should make as much as we can of this one life that we have.
- In order to get along in a world inhabited by other human beings, we should follow the ancient rule: do unto others as you want others to do unto you.
- It is better to cooperate with others and treat all humans as part of the whole human family than to spend a life in bitter competition with everyone else.
- We should be generous to the poor and respectful to the rich and powerful. Don't make enemies unnecessarily.
- We should enjoy life and have as much fun as possible. Humor and laughter are blessings.
- As an agnostic, I do not believe that God interferes in the processes of nature to reward or punish us. I believe that He merely observes. I write this with humility because I don't know. In any case, it is wrong, as a friend once told me, to say or believe that a person is destined for either heaven or hell on the basis of his beliefs. Only God can make that decision.
I recall reading once an imaginary conversation between a "liberal" and a "catholic." The writer lived in the seventeenth century in France. The "catholic" says to the "liberal:" "You must grant me the right of free speech, because that is your principle. I must not grant you that same right, because it is not my principle." Much of the writings and sayings of the conservative Christians follows this line. The conservative Christian must be allowed to proclaim his faith and must be allowed to proselytize, because his religious faith compels him to do those things. Some who oppose his beliefs must not be allowed to express themselves because to do so would violate his right of free speech and practice of religion.
This isn't a very original essay, but here it is, anyway. Comments, anyone?