Mr. Colbert, you are a thief, sir. A thief and a scoundrel.
Yesterday, at 10:42 a.m. Central, I posted my latest diary "The 60-year-old Veto Virgin" on this website. It was a heart-felt tribute to President Bush and his decision to use his first veto to prevent federally funded stem cell research. In it, I praised the will and mental clarity of the President in saving his "first time" for that one special moment.
Then last night, you, Mr. Stephen Colbert, filed this report during your allegedly popular Comedy Central show "The Colbert Report."
You stole my material! Why don't you just admit it now and save yourself further embarassment - or worse yet, "Dead to Me" status?
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Of course, if I'm going to levy such a charge against you, you'd probably like some "facts" to back it up. Well, a man I once considered wise taught me an important lesson: "Who needs facts when you've got balls?" I feel your guilt in my gut. And I say it with my balls. That's all I need.
That and the knowledge that you, Mr. Colbert, or someone on your writing staff spends a considerable amount of time on Daily Kos. How do I know this? During a previous broadcast you subtly exposed yourself as a reader when you opened the show with "Spoiler Alert: You're watching the Colbert Report!"
Somehow you know the extact title of a nightly Daily Kos feature. Every night, during your show's airing, the bloggers on Daily Kos have a live discussion about your show titled "Spoiler Alert!"
All coincidences? I don't think so. More importantly, I don't feel so.
You aired a story clearly based on my intellectual property, which was published on a website that you obviously frequent.
How does it feel to be nailed, Mr. Colbert? Please take your time, explaining it to me in great detail.
What really disappoints me is that you pass yourself off to be a patriot, yet you've violated one of the ten most important laws in the United States Constitution:
"Thou shalt not steal."
Stephen Colbert, you're no patriot. You're a thief. And you're on notice.