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Yo. Y'all been falling all over yourselves in praise of the Al Gore movie.
Al Gore, saviour of the planet!
Al Gore, the new and improved, impassioned, charismatic, dynamic, galvanizing force who's running a brilliant non-campaign campaign!
Al Gore, blah blah blah!
Well, apparently none of you here have even heard of the awesome new ground-breaking Joe Lieberman flick, no less gotten off your merlot-drinkin' asses to go see it.
What I wanna know is: Why no love for Joe...?
For those of you not yet acquainted with the powerful new cinematic rendering of the life of Joe Lieberman, please join me for a few little highlights, as I just so happened to have caught a screening of it late last night...
(In my head, that is, during a nightmare.)
Here are a few of the bits that I can recall....
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He started with such promise.
Youthful and ambitious.
So idealistic, so assured of his moral convictions.
He was a true-blue Democrat, and if not for an activist court, he would likely be our sitting veep at this very moment....
Where did it all go sour...?
When did his story turn tragic...?
There are those who say it was in a cheap motel somewhere on the political landscape off I-95...
That's where the seduction began....
(Cue Simon & Garfunkel...)
Thus began the sordid tale of Joe Lieberman's political life and affiliations.
Then the seduction became a habit.
Poor Joe found that the proximity to the powers-that-be was intoxicating and addictive.
How un-glamorous it was to meet with his real constituents in Connecticut....
How could he bear the drudgery of an afternoon stint with a bunch of whining geriatrics in some crappy nursing home in Bridgeport, when he could be in the lustrous air-conditioned tee-vee studios of Faux News, promoting the Iraq War, or gloriously preaching to us about issues of morality, ranging from the presidential-cigars-between-the-legs-of-interns-variety, or on the legislative necessity to invade the private life of a brain-dead woman in a hospital in Florida.
So seduced was poor ol' Joe that, before he knew it, he'd become a concubine....
Soon Joe was beyond the point of no return....
But even after he'd become a seething, festering, blistered flesh-sack of morally-compromised hypocrisy and corruption, this still was not enough for Joe. His seemingly insatiable need for power caused him to look for signs of weakness in others, in hopes that he could have some company on his lonely perch that was on neither side of the political aisle....
If only he could seduce an idealistic young champion of the Democratic Party -- who were now the opposition for the likes of Joe -- just as he in turn had been seduced, during his seemingly incorruptible political nascence...
But Joe was now too far gone. His powers were fading.
Some who'd once counted on him as one of their own could now see him as the cheap sycophantic spineless prevaricating two-faced bullshitting hypocrite that he was....
And there were others who did not put it so mildly....
No longer was anyone taken in by his moralistic fervor and righteousness. He'd become a walking cliché, spewing neocon talking points ad nauseum, to the point that it was painfully obvious that he was not a man who represented the good people of Connecticut or the Democratic Party, but a Republican sockpuppet with a morally-weathered sphincter....
WATCH THIS SPACE, after August 8th, for Part II of the Joe Lieberman story...